Funky Monkey, Orlando

I ate at this Asian inspired restaurant on Mills on Friday night. They started me off with some free Edamame that was ruined with lime juice and raw garlic. It killed my taste buds for the rest of the night. I next had a shrimp and scallop dumpling for $8 that was a textureless puree that somehow ended up red. I had the rice bowl with Ahi tuna for an entree at $14. It had a cucumber bottom, seaweed and two layers of tuna between the rice. The rice was al dente (but I think this was because it was old rather than cooked right). I thought it was a success until I got home and had to run to the toilet. I had a cheese plate to end the meal for $12. I was a boring plate of boring Wisconsin cheeses that took forever to arrive. It is decorated like an Asian/Bayou whorehouse. They are about 50/50 with relation to table tops versus tables. They have a 5 seat bar. They have all the pretense, but, I think the execution may be a bit beyond the chef's skill level. The service was good. The place was full at its 7 table max. I do have compliment them for having one of their better values at the lowest price point (Rice Bowl). Although, this does remind me that most of the entrees were overpriced for the talent level of the chef.

I would suggest that they leave Japanese cuisine to the experts and choose something more in line with the vibe of the place (like their cooked fish dishes). I would also move the table tops to the back of the space so that the line of sight doesn't stop at the middle of the room. I would also have a few more hands in the kitchen. I would have actual pieces of what you advertise in the dumplings (Chinese style not the red headed stepchild dumplings that the Japanese make). I would roast or lose the garlic. I would make sure my ingredients or cooking surfaces don't cause irritable bowl syndrome (or don't "spike" the food).

Udipi, Longwood - Closed

I ate at this vegetarian Indian restaurant on 17-92 on Wednesday night. Interestingly, I saw a Globe Trekker episode on the region (southern) that is home to the city of Udipi. It is an area mostly devoid of protiens, so everyone eats veggies. It is in the old Clay Oven space. I had poori (deep fried dough that puffs into a bread balloon) for $2. It was very oily. I had a fried "crepe" made out of semolina and filled with curried potatos, green chiles, and onions for $7. It reminded me of the most fried hash browns I've ever had. The portion was enormous! I can't say I enjoyed the experience because I had a sleepless night of indigestion because of it and I think I gained 4 pounds. However, it was very cheap for a sit down restaurant and it was a change from the norm. The service was polite. The place was clean. It had four other couples/families dining.

I would suggest some more ambience. Better (more eye catching) signage.

11 12 Sports Lounge, Winter Park

I watched football last night at these sports bar with a separate night club on Lee Rd. It was clean and smoke free. It was cheap ($2 beers). It had nice flatscreens. They found my obscure game and put it on. It was nearly empty. It had plenty of parking. I know it's in a rough neighborhood but I could watch games here any time. It's also on the Network.

Korean Kitchen, Winter Park - Closed

Last night I ate at this Korean restaurant on Lee Rd. I had a mix of steamed dumplings (beef, seafood, kimchi/egg) for $12. Let me tell you that I find nothing more challenging than Korean cuisine. It's part of its appeal. It's the most quixotic food in the world. It scares you. It transports you. You seriously feel like you are a caveman eating pot luck around a campfire. That said, the dumplings were ok. They stuck to the paper at the bottom of the steamer. The beef ones were a little oily. The real meal/surprise was the vast amount of "amuse bouches" that came with the plate (18 plus a cauldron of bubling goo that became scrambled eggs and a whole fried mackeral). I can recount - kimchi, bean sprouts, eggplant, green beans, sweet black beans, papaya, sweet mashed potatos, dried shrimp, water chesnuts and nine other things I can't remember or define. The veggies were either spicy, salty, sweet or sour. At least one for every taste bud. They also served free cold barley tea. It seemed to be family run. The service was good. The place is a little hard on the eyes (very bare and a little water damaged). It smelled like soap and water when I entered. I though I had made a mistake when I was the only one seated, but, four other families (mixed race) came in after me. They have table side fires. It was clean.

I would suggest replacing some of the ceiling tiles and adding some decor. I would also hide the kerosene tanks that feed the table fires. I would landscape the front and add alot of lights to advertise that you are open. It's a little dark around the building. However, it was a good value and a (still) exciting cultural experience.

Graze, Thornton Park - Closed

I ate dinner at this retaurant on S. Eola Dr on Friday night. I had the soup of the day - a creamy potato soup infused with cheese for $6 and the crispy fried chicken for $17. The soup was delicious if a bit penurious on the portion side. The chicken was a re-imagining of a typical chicken fried steak. The chicken was served atop of mashed potatoes with barbeque sauce, a white gravy and garnished with ground pork. It was as good as this meal could be. All the elements (even the barbeque sauce) worked off each other. The restaurant serves fish, etc but I tried this hearty duo because the chef is supposed to be some kind of soul food empresario. While she was not in the kitchen that night, the meal was prepared well by the chef on call. The best part of the experience was that these signature selections were the cheapest on the menu. Nothing is better than getting the house specialties at rock bottom prices. The place was techy-chic and clean. It was mostly full. The wait staff was attentive and knowledgable. They were well dressed. They served fresh baked bread. The wine selection was well chosen. The dessert menu looked tempting. They had cheese courses. They have outdoor seating. The plating was good.

I have no recommendations. It was a thoroughly pleasant experience.