Pub/Grub Crawl - Sanford: The Basin and Salvatore's (Closed)

These two are in the new Henry's Depot on 1st St. I went to the first place on Friday night and the second on Saturday at lunch. All the food stalls are now open (on days they are open). A poke, pizza, taco, ice cream and one other. I'll try them soon. None looked too world beating.

The Basin - They are a bar in the rear and have been open for seven months. They had some live music and a nice Eighties "pre-Emo" playlist after that. Think The Cure/Depeche Mode/New Order. It's basically a L shaped bar and some seats on the floor. I had a shot and a craft beer. Both were only $5. Around a dozen people were there at nine-ish. More of a cocktail bar than a dive bar. They had some kind of music festival there on Saturday.

Salvatore's - It's a sandwich stall by a guy from Rochester who named it after his father. He is very nice. I wish his sandwiches were a little more substantial or cheaper, so that I could give you a reason to bother. I had a classic Italian for $11. It's worth maybe $8. It was prosciutto, salami and ham on a roll. He added pepperoni for me. He uses Boar's Head meats. He seemed pretty impressed by that. Me not so much. You can get that at Publix. I at least expected some imports. Some regional super brand. The vegetables were also all wrong for an Italian style sandwich. He put on some field green blend that is fine on a French or American sandwich, but not on an Italian. Stick with arugula. There was also some tomato and some cheese. Mozz or provolone. Maybe oil and vinegar? Mayo. The bread is purchased from a local source and given an oil bath and sprinkled with dried rosemary. It can get into dental cavities and cause some discomfort. Plus it doesn't help the flavor of the sandwich. Clashes. The size too, is kind of puny. The size of a Jersey Mike's regular. I think that is eight inches if they don't short you. Which they do. The most expensive of their overpriced menu is $8.50. And that is roast beef that they say they roast themselves. They also have roast beef here. Boar's Head. That and a few more sandwiches. All around the same price. That is basically it. The meat coverage was basically one layer high (3 to 4 slices). Some more of the ham. I went to a place down the street for some pizza (because the pizza guy wasn't ready for customers at eleven) and they were selling sandwiches for $8. I think the sandwiches here have to get thicker, longer or more special (maybe pork and broccoli rabe or porchetta) if the price points are to remain at these levels. That said, the guy is nice. Although, I'll probably get the stink eye the next time I pass through.

All these stalls have been open for two weeks. Three weeks now.

Crafty Crab, Altamonte Springs

I tried this two week old seafood boil restaurant just south of 436 on 434 on Thursday for a late lunch. It's right off the road in a spot that was once a Himalayan barbeque place. After Backyard Burgers. It wasn't my first choice, but, I couldn't find that. I had actually been laughing at the proliferation of these places while driving around town. This must be the new "it" girl. Poke, we hardly knew ya. I ponied up for a combo of snow crab and crawfish for $19. A half pound of each. I'm not into these places. Usually the seafood is overcooked from frozen stock. This however wasn't half bad. Seemingly fresh. Now, I did have them add the "boom". That is a mix of all three of their flavorings (Cajun, buttery garlic and lemon pepper). Maybe that hid any funk. But, I swear the snow crab was juicy and plump. Not scarred with frost. A half of a crab. The crawfish were also ok. Around ten bugs. It also came with a quarter ear of corn (very fresh and not soggy) and two racquetball sized potatoes. They all arrived on a round, steel tray with a plastic "balloon" sealing in the goodness. I wonder if they steam or boil. Probably boil since they call it that. Not bad for the inferior cooking method. They also sell blue crab (ran out and that's what I would have ordered), king crab, lobster tail, dungeness crab, shrimp, clams and mussels. Head on or off shrimp. Clams are the cheapest at $10 a pound. Then crawfish at $11. Then mussels and blue crab at $13. Then whole shrimp at $16. Headless shrimp at $19. $25 for snow crab. $29 for Dungeness, $32 for lobster. And $33 for king. They have five combos (half and half). They also sell raw oysters, steamed oysters and scallops, six fried things (seven if you include cheese sticks), wings, gumbo, ten sides and three salads (only one is vegetables) and two desserts. The place has lots of wood and nautical looking things and plastic fish and license plates. It seats about eighty. Separate bar area. Washing station. There were about twenty people there at 3:30pm. Service was good. Not much to do, Since these places are now a dime a dozen, I'm not sure you need to seek these guys out. But, maybe there really is some separation when it comes to quality. I was told they are a chain. Birthplace unclear. She's crafty. Now let's see if she gets around.

Streetwise Urban Food, OIA Area - Closed

I tried this place just under two weeks ago on my way to the airport. It's on Hoffner (a half a mile west of 436) in a strip mall across from the larger supermarketed strip mall across the street. I believe they have been open for a month or two. I had a burger with pepperoni and mozzarella that is basically a pizza burger and their idea of urban street food. The patty was heavily seasoned with spices. I hate that. The beef also had that weird taste you get from places where the cows look like wildebeasts and have their ribs sticking out of their skin. It came on a brioche. Some would say that that lends it a layer of flavor. I would say it clashes with all the others. The temp was good. It was an ok size. They also serve it as a double and I think that would be too much. I kind of remember some kind of sauce on it. It also came with fries. I think they were good. The forgettable-ness of the meal says a lot. It cost $8. A similar burger with sweet plantains was about as exotic as it gets. I believe they claim to serve world cuisine. I believe the owner is Haitian. Name is Saint Pierre. The menu didn't seem very international. The only other items are other burgers, cheese steaks and a chicken and waffles dish that just looked like chicken fingers and which they could only make one order at a time. That is how I settled on a burger. I didn't want to wait. Sodas were too expensive at $3. It's a fast food type place after all. There was some talk of breakfast and if they did do it and stopped and/or if they are going to start/restart it in the future. The owner was there the first time I stopped for a recon. But, he wasn't there at lunch time this time. Just two Filipinas. The place seats about thirty. It is a long, rectangular space. Seats on the left side. A tv. Kind of modern. white. Not a must add to your collection. I think they said they are open late (after 8pm for Orlandoze).  Maybe that is a reason to try them if you are flying in at night.

*I had only one semi-new experience in Mexico. a Burger King taco looking thing called a taco de canasta. I had mine stuffed with chichurron. You could get the usual fillings.

Dexter's New Standard, Winter Park - Closed

I tried this upgrade of Dexter's in Hannibal Square today for lunch. It is located on Lee Rd and 17-92 in the spot that was that gastro pub from Tony Roma's (next to Miller's Ale House). They shut down the most recent locale and went a little higher end here. They have been open for six months. The interior seemed similar to the last tenant. I'll bet they did an overhaul. But, you can't really tell. The band area in the back is new. Maybe the patio? The color scheme is like Morgan Freeman's stubbly face (without the moles). Brown, gray and white. It's kind of farmy steam punk. It looks good. They even have a live succulent centerpiece on each white table clothed table.

The food was excellent and seemed to be taken seriously. They print the menus daily, so, I won't go into too much detail about what they serve. It probably changes a lot. The insta-celeb of the moment seemed to be tilefish. Therefore, I had to try some version of it. This took me away from my desired choice, so, I had that to go. The tile character I settled on was the cornmeal fried oyster and tilefish po boy at $12. It was served open face on a respectable bottom half of a baguette. Not overly lengthy. The oysters and the tilefish were done perfectly. No grease. Moist. Crunchy. Superb. They drizzled a little remoulade on top and the micro greens, slaw and tomato were very fresh. It was assembled with care as well. Probably tonged. It came with fries. They managed to crisp up some skin on numbers. Usually beyond the skill of most gastronauts. And the folks at El Vic's should come and see how to incorporate the paper in a fry arrangement. And actually how to run a restaurant in general. I digress. The to go show starred their pulled duck sandwich. Dexter's does one of my absolute favorites. This is not that. I would submit that this one is not as good. It is still good, but, it's too healthy. It's just duck (not very unctuous) and slaw and cranberry something or other on a brioche. Not very manly. It cost $13. It was pretty good. The po boy was better. Everybody say Po Po! Do you think someone should do a "po po" po boy? It would have to be made with pork, wouldn't it? So many possibilities.

The pricing, in general, isn't that onerous. A soda did not top $2.50. And it came with a fancy bamboo straw (it was paper, plastic police) in a nifty looking glass. And they brought an entirely new glass in lieu of a top up. I would have bet you lunch that the soda would have been $3 or $4. Finally a place with a conscience. Service was uniformed, informed  and attentive. Answered all my questions. Like "what is terses major". An inner shoulder cut that looks like a tenderloin. They even came over and served me a slice. That is on the lunch menu. Mostly sandwiches and appetizers. The dinner menu has a few more things like rib eye (kind of expensive at $39 I think), pork chops (slighty better at high twenties), chicken (low twenties) and some vegany stuff (oddly expensive). It's a very manageable menu. The kitchen is on the left side walking in and is open. Bar and patio an the right. Seats about one hundred. Around three tables full at one pm.

I'll most likely put them on the favorite's list. It may take one more tasting. This will be the last post for a little while, so, reread the previous ones if you get withdrawals. I felt I had to squeeze this one in because they deserve the pub. This will sit on top of the queue for a little while. That should benefit them.

Grub Crawl - New Smyrna Beach: Sundown Smokehouse, The Taco Shack and Uncle Chicken's

I tried these three places on US1 to the left of 44 (north from inland downtown) on Wednesday afternoon. The first two I had at lunch. The third I got to go later in the day. As usual (part of the flawed or sadistic design or the Universe), the worse the place looked on the outside, the better the food was.

Sundown Smokehouse - They are on the right side of the road about a quarter mile down. They opened six months ago. I had their beef brisket sandwich with potato salad for $10. It was roast beef. No smoke flavor at all. No bark. No fat. No oil. And they sliced it thin. We know I disagree with that.  It barbeque not delicatessen. They said they smoked it for 20 hours. That seemed odd to begin with. Either the help doesn't know enough or there has been a change in the practice of smoking meat. And if it was smoked that long, it just makes the results more perplexing. I won't say it was bad roast beef. Just not barbeque. The bun was also low grade. The potato salad tasted and looked like Publix potato salad. Over all a weak showing. They also sell pork, turkey, chicken, tri-tip, burnt ends and ribs. It appears that they hail from St. Louis. I haven't had true St. Louis style (in situ), but, this doesn't make me anxious. And I believe that St. Louis style ribs just refers to the cut. So, they may be bland too. The place is in a little shack. Around five table inside and a patio spot on the side. It is all new and clean. I think Monday was the only day they are closed.

The Taco Shack - Kind of like 'the" Ohio State University (who else was exactly causing the confusion?), this is "the" taco shack. And like the Buckeyes, they are pretty good at what they do. They are down the road a little bit on the left. In a covered patio attached to the take out window. It's like a food truck with attached seating. They have been here for nine years. It had a line! Parking was wait and see. I grabbed the 3 for $5 Shack Taco's ($2 a piece). They let me have one of each (ground beef, roasted pork and shredded chicken). I also selected hard corn tortillas. They were damn good. American style. Lettuce, cheese and tomato (not too hot sauce on the side). The ground beef had some kind of spice in it like turmeric or nutmeg. The roast pork was so oily good. The chicken was a bit bland. Still good. They packed them full of meat. They also sell steak, shrimp, fish and black bean filled tacos. The usual other Mexican options and some Latin options like tripleta, pastelon, mofongo, empanadas, Cubans, etc. Prices are great. They even do a puffy taco. Great find.

Uncle Chicken's - They are also on the left side. Diagonal from Sundown. They have a tiny space and sign that you can easily drive right by. There is a building next to it that they say will became a sit down adjunct one day. Attached, uncovered, picnic style seating is what they have now. I was stunned when I saw that the menu had creamy Pinot Grigio chicken and mushroom soup and Maine lobster for example. I don't trust any one really to deliver good lobster outside of the Northeast or Canada, so, I stuck to the soup and some barbeque (to contrast with Sundown). They also fessed up to using frozen lobster. However, they said they have relationships with other spots in town to help with the sourcing of certain things and to make sure the stuff the get is as good as it gets. It seems like they give a damn. The soup cost $5.75 for a bowl ($3.75 for a cup). It was almost very good. The chicken and little black mushrooms were plentiful and tasty. The wine in the soup was a bit overpowering. Either the alcohol hadn't burned off or it was old or it was cheap to begin with. Otherwise, very good and good on you for trying. I also had a Briskporken sandwich. That allowed me to try their pulled pork, brisket and chicken. It cost $12 and came with fries. All meats were properly done. They cut the brisket thick. It had smoke flavor and bark. They, also, said they smoked it for 20 hours. The smoker is in the front of the parking lot. The bun was good. The portions were large. The fries were very crisp. They also sell burgers, hot dogs, gyros, livers, gizzards, quesadillas, tacos, wraps, ribs, chicken, sandwiches, beer, wine and more. They even sous-vide. They have been open for 2 and half years. Great little snack bar plus.

Susuru, Disney Area *SF Travel Notes

I tried this post year old Izakaya in the second strip mall off I-4 (Disney Springs exit) on Tuesday night. The road the strip mall is on is called Palm Parkway. It's up a block or two on the right. There is another Japanese restaurant on the end. Let me start by saying it will be on the Favorite's List. If I lived down here, I would eat here every week. Too bad it isn't open during the day. I had a sampling. $3 takoyaki (2). $6 Cashu Gohan (rice bowl with pork belly). $7 okonomiyaki (fritter/hash like dish). $5 short rib yakitori (skewer) . 2 $2.50 chicken heart hatsu (skewer). I needed a baby Bjorn for my stomach on the way out. The takoyaki were very soft. The only other time I've had them this way (I believe the proper way) was at a five star yelp rated place in Vegas. These were a little more "runny" than those, but, at least they are failing in the right direction. The octopus was fresh and tender if not pervasive. I think they are a Tuesday only event. The okonomiyaki was served first and could have served as the whole meal. The only other time I've had this was at a little shop near NYU and they were filming it for tv, so, I suppose they did it the right way. This one was thicker and more formed than the one in NY. There they threw some cabbage on a grill and then some batter and other things. That one I think had some sea critter in it. Possibly octopus. This one was disc like. Less greasy. It came with a spatula to cut it into slices/pieces. Very good. The rice bowl was an afterthought that I'm glad I afterthought of. The pork (belly) was unctuous and delicious. Tons of it. The rice was great. It came with other toppings which elude me at the moment. Again, it could have been the meal unto itself. The short rib replaced beef tongue which they ran out of. It was great too. Four big hunks of (once again) unctuous beef. So good, I saved it for my last bite. *Do you ever find that the second to last bite usually is the best for some reason? And even though you have only two bites staring back at you, you always take the wrong one (if you are saving the best for last), the best one. Anyway. The chicken hearts were also magic. Four to a skewer. A half a heart was a piece. Great grilled flavor. Fresh. A soda was even only $2 (with refills). And to think I almost stormed out because they told me there was a thirty minute wait (it was only five minutes) with plenty of open tables at nine pm. And that could be the sole issue. They don't have enough bus people. The hostess had to help out and many tables sat in their grossness for far to long. Not to mention the opportunity cost. The place is a square room with the kitchen in the right rear corner. A high chair area is in front of it. It seats about sixty. It was full and people were still coming in after me. The crowd was all over the map. It's decorated with all kinds of Japanese pop culture and marketing paraphernalia. The menu has five or six sections. I ate a thing or two from most to give you and idea of them (not the ramen though). The Japanese sake, beer and soju selection was good. Not too expensive either. The service was as fast as the kitchen would allow. Polite. The owners (2) are not Japanese, but, you (or I) wouldn't know it. This place has been on my hit list for a while and I've had several hiccups trying to scratch it off. I'm glad I persevered. It's worth a potential battle with I-4 and Disney traffic. I believe they also run Jade in College Park. This is much better.

*Travel Notes - San Francisco : Here are a few things I tried or saw in San Francisco. Salt and Pepper Wings at Dim Sum Corner on Grant. They were ok. Needed a stint in the oven after frying though. They also had a egg custard lava bao that I've never seen before. I also asked about the cheese topped tea that I mentioned I saw this summer in England (and they offered). They said it tasted like cheesecake. I was too parched to take the chance. Went with iced coffee milk tea boba. I, also, had a great lettuce cup dish at R&G Lounge on Kearney. It was like the squab or chicken cups you see at other places. This was made with shrimp and scallops and Chinese sausage. So good. Quality seafood. I also had a really good chicken salad at Trader Vic's and a double double on the Wharf that renewed my faith in In and Out. And since I appear to be going into detail, I had a good brisket sandwich at Big Nate's at the Chase Center of all places and some interesting sour dough options at Boudin on the Wharf.

Grub/Pub Crawl - Sanford: Louise's Cellar, Ellen's Wine Room, Brix & Mortar, Loggerhead Distillery and Tuffy's

I tried these spots in downtown (on the lake) last Friday in between the hours of 7pm and 11pm.

Louise's Cellar - I stumbled upon this little tapas themed place on Sanford Ave (near Westside or West End whatever it is Bar) after I was informed that Brix & Mortar does not serve anything other than a shit-cuturie board and everything across the street at Seoul Sushi cum food truck (at Celery City) was two times more expensive than it deserves to be. It is also a bottle shop and odds and ends shop. It has been in business for two years. It's easy to pass by. I settled on some lamb lollipops (2) over couscous (Israeli). It was one of the few "entrée level" things on the menu. It was better than I expected. Especially the lamb. It cost $16. The bar and food are run by separate entities. You will have to pay two checks. The food was served (and I suspect prepared) by a one armed woman. Not that it matters in any way other than I'm impressed at the adaptability of the human species, but, it's not something you are exposed to every day. The bar is run by a very attractive and boisterous Puerto Rican woman with a seemingly larger than average familiarity with world culture. The place is named for her grand mother and it seems like she could have been the interior designer. It's very boho chic. If chic at all. There is a bar and the rest of the "dining room' is just a few tables and sitting areas with sofas. They have a big selection of non "me too" wines and craft beer. The food menu is heavy on the little Spanish appetizers that are nearly as expensive as the mains. There were four people at the bar and two idiots snickering over on line (and headphone-lessly broadcast) videos. Is that what passes for date night now? They were ancient too. What gives? There is a large-ish patio too. Not a bad little find.

Ellen's Wine Room - I walked down the block to see what was new (a cigar bar, a goth bar named Mannikan;s, a bar called Buddha something, Throwback's Bar, Sanford Ave Bar. - a few of these I named before) and ended up here. It is a wine store that serves some things by the glass and has live music. Me and one other man on a computer were the only ones there. I had a glass of wine for $8. Big pour. It was relaxing. They said they have been open at night for nine years. I could swear it was closed every time I've walked by in the evening.

Brix & Mortar Urban Winery - On off shoot of a place in Austin. They buy grapes and make shitty wine out of it. I had a watery and disappointing 2018 dry rose made from Washington grapes for $8. This batch was from the Austin "winery", so, it should have had any kinks worked out. It doesn't bode well for the Sanford made inventory. Rose has to be one of the easiest types to get right. They offer four whites, three pinks, eight reds and three fruits. A flight (5) is $15. The place is an L rectangular shape. Skinny from left to right. The bar is on the right side in the front. There is a mingling area in the rear. It looks nice and modern. Some wood and a lot of white. It is next to The Old Jailhouse and you can watch them eat through a curious window wall. They opened two weeks ago.

Loggerhead Distillery - They can't sell here, so, it is free samples. They have four options for now. A flavored and unflavored moonshine and a flavored and unflavored vodka. All were very good. The flavored moonshine was apple pie something or other. It was very tasty. The swag is cool as hell. Great logo, etc. The place looks cool. Wood and glass. It is on West 2nd near Fuel BBQ and a restaurant I can't think of right now. They closed at nine pm. Open for under a year.

Tuffy's Bottle Shop Lounge - Down the street (leaving town) by a block from Loggerhead. I wrote about them a year or so ago. This time it was packed. I camped out in the rear bar (serve yourself area) and never left. The bartender and another couple were throwing around "tastes" of all kinds of great beer and cider and whiskey. It was a very 'informative" experience. The selection is excellent. Prices weren't bad at all. The only irritating thing was a $3 corkage fee on all drinks. Still a good deal. Probably my favorite bar in Sanford for whatever reason. They are also building some big events space in the rear.

*the food hall on the main street into town may be two weeks away.

Cask & Larder, OIA

One more interruption before I get back in order. I ate here last Saturday night. I never fly out of this terminal (Gates 100+). Of course we give Southwest and Alaska our best terminal with the best food because everything is ass backwards in this town. They told me that they closed the one in Winter Park and this one is not just an airport knock off but a "real" dining effort. It has been here for a few years (3?). I wasn't really hungry, but, I grabbed a bacon cheeseburger (with chips) and an ice tea from the to go window. It was good. The burger was a bit worked over and over cooked, but, it still had a nice beefiness and char to it. The bun was good. The bacon was very good and thick and smoky. The tomatoes were treated in some unusual way. Almost a cross between a pickling and  a sun dried flavor. It also came with bibb lettuce. It cost a reasonable $10. The tea cost under $3. The chips were an artisan sounding packaged kind. The burger costs a few bucks more if you dine in. They said it would be bigger though. The menu seemed similar to the Winter Park one. It has been a while. Prices too. They also sell pre made meals and local snacks l(ike Wondermade marsh mellows)in the to go area. The setting is open with a kind of latticed dome over head. There is a separate bar area too. It's easily the best food experience at the airport. I believe they stay open until around 8pm (or when the place clears out).

Grub Crawl - College Park: El Vic's Kitchen (Closed) and Bagel Bruno

I'm going to go out of order for the first time because I feel I need to contribute a public service asap and give a gut check to an establishment that is in a death throe. I will tell you about my Friday night when I get back. I went to these places today at lunch time.

El Vic's Kitchen - They replaced a nice French place (Tartine) on Edgewater (where Tin & Taco is) around two months ago. That is more than enough time to work out the kinks and less than enough time to be showing such weariness. They have already abandoned the breakfast menu. However, they haven't even changed the hours on their window. Anal is not something I would ascribe to management. They did next to nothing with the interior. They took down a poster of France and put up some lettering that calls out the name. My table cloth and seat had crumbs on it. No table setting. When the only other people (2) got up to leave, they didn't replace the table cloth or even "snap" it out or brush it down. I doubt they have EVER been changed (or laundered). The floors were equally dirty. And the counter top. I'd hate to do a finger test. They had only one well meaning, but, mostly clueless tween waitress. I'd wager she was a relative. I ordered a Golden Cubano because it seemed like the simplest and cheapest way out of this apparent nightmare. They didn't even press it. It was to come with cheddar cheese. The "golden' part. It was a shredded cheese blend from the supermarket. As was the "baguette". Straight up Publix bread complete with the machine "braille' marks underneath. It was also stale. 3/4 of the sandwich was bread. The one piece of ham was probably from Publix too. The veg were of poor quality, flavorless and wilting. The Swiss cheese was not melty. It came with fries. 3/4 were undercooked. Plus, in a bit of Indian thrift, they put a crumpled piece of paper in the container to limit the fry out take. The best part of the dish for the garlic spread. It cost $11. The plating was cute. On a slice of tree trunk plate with a basket for the fries. $3 mini glass of soda with ice. It took too long to come out. They seemed to be more focused on their buffet (which should have already been finished by 12:30 for a place that opens at 11). Plus, I doubt any more people were coming for the buffet than were coming to Eleanor Rigby's wedding. The menu is a weird collection of "world cuisine". Mostly Indian though. They had some things that seemed interesting (mushroom cappuccino soup) and some that did not (Shepard's Pie quesadilla). But, I think the soup was just a play on names. The only thing they described in the description line was that it came with truffle oil. What makes it cappuccino? Probably just the color. I saw three of the kitchen staff.. They looked like a work release. I could continue to list the failings of this endeavor, but, I doubt they would benefit from any of it. They need someone with management experience. It seems to be a cook run business. A cook that doesn't have front of the house or back office experience. I expect you will be reading their obituary any week now and I'll have to haul my ass back here to chronicle the next disaster.

Bagel Bruno - They took over Hubbly Bubbly near Edgewater High and Ollie's  in November. They sell bagels with schmears and as sandwiches. Around 5 breakfast types. Nothing out of the ordinary. And 5 sandwich like bagels. Same. I grabbed a $4 sesame with cream cheese. It is a properly made (puffy), good looking bagel with proper cream cheese. Full sesame seed coverage. The bagel is $2 and the schmear is $2. They partner with Foxtail Coffee. The place is modern and cute. Bagels are displayed on a glass wall (hanging on glass poles). They have a little patio. Parking is sufficient

Mai Thai, Downtown *NV/AZ/NM Travel Notes

I tried this Thai (though not all dishes are Thai) spot (in the old Artisan's Table location) on Pine yesterday at lunch. I think I recently remarked on it as Muy Thai. That would have been more clever. I'm not sure why my synapses misfired when I plugged this into my brain. It has a mostly ordinary selection of Thai dishes. The outliers include grouper, short ribs and a rib eye in the Specialty section. Other than that, it is 4 noodle dishes, 7 stir fry dishes, 3 fried dishes, 2 duck, curry rice dishes, 11 apps, 5 soups and 5 salads. I chose the red curry with chicken because I hadn't had that in while. It comes with bell pepper, carrots, bamboo, snow peas, zucchini and basil. I avoided the peppers. It cost $10 (at lunch - $13 at dinner). It was fine. The chicken was a little plastic-y. A fair volume. The rice was over cooked. The veg were cut into little shapes. Served on a white plate (rice) and a trapezoidal white bowl. The meal began with a comp Thai spring roll and a iceberg lettuce and carrot salad with an orange zest dressing. The décor is similarly ho hum to the menu. A huge, open plan, high ceilinged box that seats over 100 in 25 tables of 4. A bar area is up front. The colors are white, black and some shade of pastel that I believe was in the red spectrum. Maybe it was green. More synapse degradation. The front side is all glass window. I don't think they did that much to the old space. The tables were a bit worn. Service was fine. Parking is obviously an issue. There were around sixteen people eating there at 1pm. They aren't open on Sunday. It's fine, but not worth a trip. I think they said they have been open for six months.

*Travel Notes- Nevada/Arizona/New Mexico: Here are some Thai dishes I had last week in Las Vegas: Tom Kha (coconut milk + soup), Kana Moo Grob (fried pork belly and broccoli stems in an oyster sauce), Khao Man Som Tam (coconut rice topped with sweet pork), Green Papaya Salad, Ju Pa Bao (a Macanese style bao of pork cutlet with the bone in). The first two were from Krung Siam on Spring Mountain Blvd. The second two were from Pok Pok in the Cosmopolitan. It is run by some famous chef from Portland.

**The other interesting items from the trip were: Blueberry Milkshake from Mr D'z Route 66 Diner in Kingman AZ, Lobster Taquitos and French Fries smothered in NE Clam Chowder from Slapfish in Glendale AZ, Green Chili Burrito from Taylor Freeze in Pima AZ and Itsa Burger from Blake's Lotaburger in Truth or Consequences NM.

***DT News: Cucina is still not open. Graffiti Junction closed. Elize replaced Rusty Spoon. Artisan's Table is across from it. CFS coffee shop is open on the side of Cucina. Orange County Brewing is being replace by Motorworks Brewing. I think they spell it "werks". The market near Morgan and Morgan is not open yet. The "depot" building seems to be some of kind of crafts store. I keep meaning to see if El Buda is still open. I think it closed down a while ago. Speaking of which. Does Hamburger Mary's have a Booty Burger? I was thinking it would be a natural. I don't think it would be that offensive. And it rolls off the tongue.

Grub Crawl - Azalea Park and Casselberry: CBG and Crab Ocean (Closed)

I've spotted four new places on 436. These are two. I tried them this afternoon. The first is near on the north side of 50. The receipt says Azalea Park. I've never heard that area called that. The second place is at Howell Branch Rd. I'd be surprised if either is with us in a year.

Coffee Burgers Grill - It seemed like it may be a cute chain or something. It was just a boring Puerto Rican café. It opened a week ago. I had the "little" cheeseburger for $2.85 and a chicken philly for $6. The patty on the CB was as thin as a Krystal burger. The odd thing is that the vegetables were the best part. Very fresh. The chicken was the on redeemable part of the philly. The bun was hot dog bad and they used shredded something or other and American cheese. Onions were ok. The chicken was just pounded down, grilled chicken. The place serves all meals. It is oddly brand new yet seemingly dingy. It was empty when I was there. It was a little late for lunch and they are new (1 week), but.... The craziest thing they offer is ribs. Mostly café food. It took longer than it should to come out.

Crab Ocean - It took over the spot that was most recently a Smokey Bones. In a big parking lotted strip mall that has never had anything good in it. It's a by the pound "boil" place. Mostly. I grabbed a fried catfish basket to go from $10. It was better than I expected. I don't usually buy fried seafood, but, I wasn't hauling a pound of boiled shrimp home for dinner. It came with fries. They battered them. But, they were at least fresh and plentiful. They also added some ketchup, cole slaw (tiny tin), and tartar sauce. And a bib, two forks, two sets of plastic gloves and some napkins. Never received gloves before. The portion was four pieces of densly coated catfish. It was fried nicely. Good crust. The lack of oil actually concerned me. Not freshly fried? Or superbly fired? The coating seemed like ground corn flour. I'm not sure if I'll go back. I don't like buying seafood from places that cater to a mass audience. You can't trust the quality of the seafood or the preparation. Although, everything is flash frozen nowadays, so who knows. They sell blue crab, shrimp, crawfish, snow crab, clams, green or black mussels, king crab, dungeness crab and lobster tail (probably Caribbean or Australian). They range from $13 to $34 a pound. They also let you mix and/or choose a "boil" (corn, potato. egg, etc mixed in). I don't like boiled seafood/ I like steamed seafood. Another reason I may not be back. They also have fried shrimp, swai, oystrer, calamari and chicken baskets. All $10. Raw or steamed oysters on the half shell. The place is huge. I would guess the "log" interior is left over from Smokey Bones. They threw up some kayaks and lighthouses to make it "nautical". There is a full service bar in the center rear. A square floor plan. The name is poorly chosen. As is the signage. There was a fancier seafood place down the road that just closed (and the building demolished) and one on Alamo that did too. I'm not sure if they are aware of that. This is a big space and if the lease isn't favorable, I don't see them drawing enough people to make it work.

*I was bemoaning the lack of artistry a few posts back. I'm reading a book now that has it. It's called Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace. It's not new or unknown. Marshall from How I Met Your Mother did a movie about him. All kinds of devotees love this thing. I've almost picked it up several times in my life and got distracted. I'm glad I finally started it. It's impressive. It interweaves multiple stories in a semi-fictional future. Odd settings (and characters) like a competitive tennis academy, AA hallway house, a government agent stake out, etc. It's too bizarre to try and describe. It was written in the mid-ninties and presages phenomena like Net Flix and Celebrity Presidents. I like books like Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and Utopia and Gulliver's Travels that lampoon society. This is in that vein. It's a dense and difficult read at first. You don't understand certain things (like why the dates are "sponsored" by products) and his vocabulary and breadth of knowledge of complicated subject matter is impressive. He writes like Kerouac on a speed high. Few paragraphs. Endless description (but so singular). He wrote his own key word addendum to explain things. It's hundreds of pages on its own. I bought it in an airport for around $20 last April. It was mass marketed for an anniversary. So, it's around. My version is just under one thousand pages (without the addendum). It reminds me of Salinger, Burroughs, Kerouac, Proust, Woolf, HS Thompson and maybe a little Bret Easton Ellis. I dare you to.

Grub Crawl - New Smyrna Beach: Caffe Vesuvio's, Bagel World and Pappas Drive In

I visited these places during the day on the thirteenth. The first two are on 44 after you cross over the intercoastal. The last one is on US 1 before the airport.

Caffe Vesuvio's - I grabbed two slices of pepperoni for $3 a piece. They said the owner is from Napoli. You couldn't really tell by these spongy, American, low cheese quality slices. Better looking were some sandwiches I saw being served to another table. I felt I should have gone in this direction while looking at the menu, but, I thought it was just a pizzeria and I had prepared myself for slices to be eaten on the beach. The thing about the sandwiches was the bread. It looked "baguette-y". They said they bake it there. It looked like it. They have a full Italian menu. It is a a full service restaurant. New. Not bad looking. A 16" pizza is $14. Most things are not above the mid-teens. I should go back and do it for real at some point. I think they said they have been open for a year or so.

Bagel World NSB - This little shack was a bit farther down the street. Near the curve. I grabbed a jalapeno bagel with regular cream cheese for $3. I've had worse bagels. That's about all they have. Some breakfast sandwiches and a few more things. Tiny place. Oldish. Ten or so varieties of bagels. They said they have been there for decades. Like forty or fifty.

Pappas Drive In - There are around five or six places I have to try on US 1. I picked them first because I'm a sucker for drive ins. I'll venture that this is Greek owned. Some of the items were Greek. A huge menu of every thing from prime rib and grouper to hot dogs and milkshakes. I grabbed a double cheeseburger (only 70 cents more), a hot dog and a vanilla coke float. The DCB was $3.25. The HD was $1.95. The float was $2.50. I ate them for dinner. The float and HD were average. The DCB was pretty good. Crinkly patty. Buttered bun. You can order and eat in your car or eat inside. They took credit cards. They also have a full breakfast menu that is served anytime. A little more on the menu. They have Italian dishes. They have seafood platters. They have liver and onions. Like I said, it has almost everything. They even have beer. And cereal. You get the idea. A living compendium of Twentieth Century dining.

* Some things I've seen lately: On CNN in the airport. A special on coffee. Two crazy ones I remember are the Sami people of Sweden putting cheese in their coffee in place of milk and a Vietnamese version with eggs instead of milk (war shortages started it).  I also saw a Canadian Guy Fieri-like show where they go to Rome and the place makes a cacio e pepe pizza by putting ice cubes in the middle of the dough and then bakings it and then adding (see how I'm making the verb tenses agree)  grated cacio to the water. I also ate an interesting porridge in Jackson Hole. It was made with quinoa, granola, soy milk, shredded coconut and fresh fruit.

** Riddle me this - Why does a sub 7oz bag of gold fish crackers fit in such a smaller bag than 7oz of Cape Cod potato chips (or 5oz of others)? It's rhetorical. One scum bag is selling you air and not exactly helping the environment. I don't get it. You would think the economics of stuffing more packages in a delivery vehicle would offset whatever marketing benefits large size packaging must deliver. And a note on the "green" item I cited recently about fashion and the environment. I also just have received confirmation of a theory I have held for years. All you little twits constantly on your smart devices and recharging them at every turn. Inquire into have much electricity is required to quench you addiction. And then chirp about sustainability.

Delaney's Tavern, SoDo

I tried this replacement of Doc's across from the hospital (is it still ORMC?) on South Orange two Sundays ago at lunch. It opened in August. It is now on the ground floor. They have put a nice looking (didn't see the rooms) hotel on the second floor. It's run by the Doc's owner. Doctor something or other. They have a brunch ($40) on Sunday's. I didn't try it. Aside from some meat (prime rib?) carving station, it seemed like a VERY middling hotel spread. They had stone crabs, but, they were so small and hairy (thawed) that you know they tasted like origami. I went with scallop and shrimp grits for $22. It wasn't that much of a hose job. They offered up four "real" (abductor attached), large scallops and four plump, fresh shrimp. Cooked perfectly. The purple grits (I think from some supplier in Jacksonville that they felt we would be impressed by by naming them on the menu) were also what they should be. They also added a lot of tasso ham and I think some kind of cheese. It was topped with a creamy, tomato-y, peppery sauce akin to (and maybe) a remoulade. A nice serving size. The menu had just changed and was diverse and manageable. I remember $13 burgers, $10 flat breads, $10 sandwiches and then some higher priced "structured" main courses. They give every type of shopper an exit ramp. The one peeve they plucked was the $3.50, ice filled soda. Really? They also had a trendy collection of wine, beer and cocktails. The buffet was served in a "back room". I was in the front (bar). There was a smallish "middle" room. The floor plan is rather rectangular. I was across from the bar in an elevated, semi-circular booth. There were two couples at the bar, one in the middle room and four of five couples in the buffet area. It seemed like a mix of hotel guests and artsy locals. The décor was on the trendy side. I seem to recall grays and blacks. More sterilized "farmsy/woodsy" than industrial. All new. Not a ton of light. TVs above the bar. Service was professional and polite. On the weekends you can parking in front on the metered (thanks City Beautiful) streets or they have a parking garage in back (that they validate) or a valet service. I think I liked Doc's. I definitely like Delaney's. I haven't been able to say that about new openings very much lately. So, I guess I have to tell you to make the effort. It's a much better re-do than Julie Broughton's tummy tuck and breast reduction. It should be on the 2020 Favorite's list.

*Starbucks promised to eliminate food waste by 2020. Now they say that they will be 60% NON-compliant by 2021! Remember that the next time you pat yourself on the back for spending responsibly or believing "socially" responsible pr bs. I could also tell you some things about how much fossil fuel the fashion industry uses. But, you wouldn't feel so smug about yourselves then. Would you? I mean, I HAVE to be on trend. I don't have to take a plane to cross the ocean.

Grub Crawl - Mills/50: Chi-Kin and Z Asian

I tried these places around Mills and 50 last Saturday night.

Chi-Kin Korean Fried Chicken - It's run by the King Bao people. They opened December 11th. It's basically Wing Zone meets Chik-Fila. I ordered ten wings for $11. I believed they would be Korean fried (batter). They were just fried in their own skin and doused with gojujang sauce. I forgot to ask them to serve it on the side so it wouldn't make the skin soggy. Why wing people don't just do this for their own benefit is beyond me. The wings tasted like they had been injected or marinated with something briny. I hate that. I also ordered some waffle fries. They were fine. They are open all day every day. They are in the old Noodles and Rice location on Mills near to 50 (7-11 side). They also sell chicken sandwiches, fingers and bibimbap. Very little parking.

Z Asian - As the name implies, this is a Vietnamese Kitchen. I kid. I spoke with the owner and the name is more preposterous when explained. It's not even like when companies try and get first listing in a phone book (or whatever they use nowadays) by putting AAA in front. This puts them last. He said it is for the Z generation. He, somehow, is trying to force them to eat his "traditional" dishes which he thinks they are forsaking. I'll get back to that in a minute. So, I guess he thinks they will see a "Z" and be drawn like moths to a flame and then he sneaks in the same-o lame-o menu. I'll bet his menu is listed online. I guess he doesn't know people can do recon before they leave the house. It gets better. Now, he is now going to change the menu to have more "street" food. Doesn't that defeat the original mission statement? I guess those dishes could be "traditional" But, why not start there? The menu is BOOORING. I used to like Vietnamese food. But, I can think of no other category that is as "me-too" as Vietnamese cuisine. Rice Noodles (with or with out broth). Or swap noodles for the rice itself. And how about a roll. Fried or raw. It's the same dullness in every Vietnamese restaurant that opens. Give me a break. Try something not "traditional". Even if it is just to differentiate yourselves so you can charge more. I'm begging you. If there are no more of grandma's recipes you are hiding from  us - Evolve!

I had a $12 noodle special that they rang up as beef ($2 more) and then made it seem like they were doing me a favor by fixing it after I called them out. It was rice noodles with grilled pork and shrimp and a spring roll. The spring roll was most likely purchased ready made. The pork was good. The shrimp were tiny and terrible. Old shrimp taste and smell married with a burnt taste and smell. This is another thing I'm starting to resent. The quality of the goods served is very poor. Especially seafood. They make $5 Chines take out look particular. You can't even experiment because you know anything "exotic" won't be fresh. The noodles were tasteless (as they must be). The fish sauce (that you have to employ) is a poor major component. It's like the first Vietnamese ate this and then one day said "This is so bland. The fish sauce isn't working for me. Can I at least get the water from the pot with it"? And pho was born. I hope they can come up with some new dishes because there is no reason to come here (or anywhere) as it is. Just pick the closest Vietnamese place and go there, They are all identical. *Another disconnect is that this "traditional" menu has two Thai dishes on it.

The place looks ok except for the misplaced logo and neon sign. The "traditional" décor is at odds with them. The tables and seats are wood. The chair frames are metal. Wood wainscoting. Black ceiling. Gray walls. Some nice art work. It seats about ninety. Bar against back wall. Window views of traffic. Nine people there. They still asked me to move to another table (from the one the host seated me at) even with no dinner rush probable. Unsurprisingly, no new customers came in after me. It opened in May. Not open Monday. Parking in back. On 50. SusHi next door. Obviously I'm not recommending it. I don't know if you saw Rock of Ages. In it, they make a boy band called Z Boyz. with a z on the end. That is the joke. They think the Z makes it better. It doesn't. It makes it worse. Way worse.

The Steer Steakhouse, Belle Isle - Closed

I tried this steakhouse in the old German restaurant location (Baern Steuben?) on South Orange and Sand Lake on Saturday at lunch. They are closed Sunday and Monday. They opened in May. It was a good value. Way better than any chain steak restaurant. I had the daily special because it was so amazingly inexpensive and then threw in an app for curiosity's sake. The special cost $9 and was comprised of salad, bread, prime rib and side. The salad was a little "American". Iceberg, cherry tomato and cucumber. The veg and bowl were cold, so, it was pre-prepared. That killed any flavor it would have had. The veg were all fresh though. The blue cheese dressing they buy had big chunks of cheese in it. The bread was pressed and buttered and cut into strips. The spread was a little off. Either butter stored uncovered in the fridge (absorbed odors) or margarine or something. The prime rib is something I usually avoid because I find it fatty and slimy. They grilled theirs with a rub and that was something I approve of. (and never have seen). It was a long, thin cut. The only problem was that it was one third total fat. All of one end. You couldn't trim that? Probably why it was on the special menu. It came with a sauce it didn't need. They called it Hunter sauce. It was a dark gravy topped with fried onions and cauliflower. For a side, I chose mac and cheese. It was a huge bowl full. A little bland and thin for my taste. Maybe they used skim milk? Or they didn't drain the pasta well? They put some cheese on the top. That helped. It came in a metal tin. The app I settled on was chimichurri beef skewers. They cost $8. I thought they would be strips of flank. They (2) were cubes (4) of a better cut. I couldn't eat them there (too full), so, I tried one cube and then wrapped them up and nuked them the next day. They were good. Even after a wait and an x-ray. No fat. Sauce was good. The menu is small enough to be managed. They have T-bones and filets, etc. They have sandwiches and burgers. They have other meats (ie gator). They have soups and salads. The wine selection was better than I expected. They have a wine display area in front. They have flights of beer. You know that's fancy. Prices are in line. Service was fast and polite. It seats about sixty. Only four others were there at lunch. It is an open floor plan with room between tables. It has a Western motif. I believe a piano man performs nightly. Parking was ample. Informal dress code. I wasn't sure if it would be have "airs". It doesn't. It isn't STK, but, it isn't Texas Roadhouse either. If that is the scale from one to ten, then it is like a seven on the fancy meter. If they lose things like the Hunter Sauce and used fancier salad greens, it would make them more "respectable". However, I'm sure their target market would rather not see that. I enjoyed what it offers and loved the value. Let's see that more than the average viewership of this blog is seated by the time I return.

Shaka Donuts, SoDo - Moved to Curry Ford Rd

I tried this debut donut shop on Michigan, one block east of Orange, yesterday in the morning. They opened on January 1. Although it sounds Polynesian, it is a CF ideation. I had a Samoa (Caramel icing with toasted coconut and chocolate drizzle) and a Black Sand Beach (Oreo Cookie "sand" on vanilla icing). Both cost $1.65. Bargains! They serve a "cake" (unleavened) donut underneath. The fluffy kind is in the works. They spit them out of a machine into oil before your very eyes. This means they are super fresh. And warm and soft. They also "top" them to order. This slows things down. The work space and work force may be too small if they blow up. Worth it though. Maybe they can redesign? They have a host of "fun" donuts. Six icings (chocolate, vanilla, caramel, cream cheese and two others I'm flaking on). They also top with peanut butter and cinnamon. They all have nick names. There is a Buddy Dyer. I stayed away because I thought it would be slimy and/or have pock marks in the dough. Maybe a trendy gray sand coating. Toppings are things like Reese's Pieces and Fruity Peebles. They also have breakfast sandwiches and coffee. A soda was only $2. The place is small. Modern. It was full. I checked in because traffic on I4 scuttled plans to go further west. I'm glad the Ultimate Lifetime Employment Project did it's thing and rerouted me here. It will be the first to be on the 2020 Favorites List. What was that thing Ali G used to say? Shak-shimas? Anyway. Shaka Khan (I know that's a mis-spell). Shaka Zulu. And shaka your ass over here for same damn fine donuts. I Just Can't Shaka My Love.

2019 Favorites List and Travel Notes Index

This list looks like my music download folder for the year. A small collection of "reaches". It is utterly confounding how we live in an era with access to anything and time for everything and it all devolves into the utterly banal.. And that is sugar coating it. Where are the true artists and thinkers of our time?

$$$$ - H Steakhouse, Itta Bena

$$$ - Local Pearl Oyster House (New Smyrna Beach), Tori Tori, Mia's Italian Kitchen, The Old Jailhouse (Sanford)

$$ - Prima Pizza Cucina (New Smyrna Beach), Saporito (Ocoee), F&D Italian Kitchen

$ - Art's Sandwich Shop, Burger Barn, Earth Fare, BTW (Tavares), Boulay, Midici

Travel Notes Index

April 3 - NM

April 8 - MN

May 17 - Korea/Taiwan/Japan

June 20 - England

August 12 - England/France/Spain

August 28 - Macedonia/Serbia/NYC

September 27 - Greece/Romania/Cyprus

October 23 - WI/OH/IN/MN

November 21 - Italy/Switzerland/Malta

December 20 - Canary Islands

Broken Spoon, Lake Mary - Closed

I ate at this new (one month) restaurant in the Winn Dixie shopping center off Lake Mary Blvd at lunch on Monday. It replaces the failed Rossellini's. They seem to be in for the same fate. First off, the menu is all over the place and priced too high for the experience. Secondly, the food took too long to deliver and I believe they used a microwave for at least a portion of its preparation. Thirdly, they did nothing to the décor. Fourthly, they are doing no marketing. Fifthly, they are hidden in the rear of an unpopular shopping center. Sixthly, they don't seem to sweat the small stuff. I'll expound. The owner is Loatian. A corporate caterer. First restaurant. He tosses in a few Loatian dishes like larb (and Chinese bao) onto a mostly American motif. While I embrace the chance to "explore", I am not middle America. This will confuse most John's and Joan's and make them question the cooks ability to make good on the hometown cuisine. Plus the dishes (these plus all of the rest) are too expensive. Sticky Rice (and it is way more hip than this place) has larb at under $5. Baos should cost a buck or two. Everything on this menu is in double digits. Even the lunch specials are in the teens. And you can't even get a soda with them. Only iced tea. A lot of entrée level meals are around twenty bucks (or higher). They also mis-price some usually pricy dishes like osso buco on the low side. Osso buco? You say. Yeah! This menu is all over the place. They have things like burgers ($15 ouch), chicken and waffles ($18), sandwiches, salads, soup and I think steak. It's like a café or diner ensemble. I had a sausage and sliced steak sandwich for $13. It came with french fries. While I found the sandwich tasty, there were a few issues. The tips of the sausage were dry and hard spongy. That usually indicates some nuclear interference. And the bun was chewy and flaking apart. More microwave (and age) evidence. Maybe they just did it to warm it or melt the cheese on top. However, that leads me to the timing issue. I believe they aren't ready for prime time and I was waiting on the oil to heat up to cook the fries. If that wasn't the case, then god help them because there was only one other diner there competing for their attention and she ordered a salad. And back to the bread. It was cheap shit in a plastic bag, sold by the dozen like hot dog buns from a mass producer kind of way. You know how I know. It had those little balls on the bottom that only the worst machine made baked goods have. I mean, come on. At least source what the supermarkets make. Daily! There is a Winn Dixie next door. I'm not asking for artisan crafted bs. Back to the meal. The sandwich came with grilled peppers and grilled onions and provolone. It was tasty. The beef was pretty tender. The sausage was ok (probably mass produced). The fries were a bit above average. They seemed to have a garlic element to them. Almost too starchy. Plating was basic. Napkins were cloth. That's the priority? I'd rethink that bit of style over substance.

As I said, the décor is the same. Drab. Old. It isn't making the impression you want to justify the pricing. The view of the golf course is good, but, not Instagram worthy. Let me give you a history lesson. Tthis place was only considered higher end when there was no competition in town and even then the people who went there didn't really know what high end was anyway. People from lower middle class neighborhoods outside of northern manufacturing centers who got transferred down here by corporations chasing cheap land, labor and taxes. For them, the spot was as good or better than any pre-foody steak house or mafia style Americanized Northern Italian trattoria was number one in their community. Plus this place was within sniffing distance of a country club. The kind they were prohibited from joining back home. But, I'm talking thirty years ago. The choices have exploded. Expectations have risen. And this spot really hasn't been upgraded since. I'll even bet they did nothing to the useless ac system. Just wait until the summer sun comes through those bay windows. The few changes they made seem to be focused on the tables. They added high tops that are set in between the low tops. This gives the space some variation. I believe the tables are different too. Not quite as cheap as their predecessors. The two waitresses were sweet and attentive. They were also a bit more of what you would expect at a diner or café. Another mismatch. I'm not saying I had any issue with it. But, many people judge on appearances. And that leads me back to my prediction.

 I believe this place is run on a shoestring. And while that can limit your losses, it also can limit your prospects and why I'm not in the restaurant business. I'm all for word of mouth or guerilla marketing, but, what is the hook? Price? No. Performance? No. Difference? No. Style? No. Location? No. Speed? No. There is nothing for word of mouth to mouth. It's just an overpriced, mish mosh of mediocrely prepared, poorly sourced, garden variety food items served in a hard to find, drab, empty, failed location. I hate to be a wet blanket, but, I strongly suggest you abandon any pretention of earning a Michelin star and halve the pricing, send out some two for one mailers and take on Bob Evan's. Either that or open up your wallet and start over. The people before you tried to ignite the Luigino's "magic" (price points) with seafood and Italian (not sure if there were more). They couldn't and I'll tell you why.

There are already too many places in that high price/high quality (if they ever really had that level of quality) quadrant. It started with Stonewood across the street. They became the "fancy" place. Decades ago. That is the comp. Make a visit and compare yourself. You aren't at that level (which isn't that outstanding anyway). And no one wants to be in the high price/low quality quadrant. Which is where people might put you now. The only quadrant you could conceivably survive in would be the low price/high quality quadrant. This is the least desirable from a providers point of you, but, the market you chose and the location you chose has sealed your fate. It's this or nothing. You can't do low quality/low price because many franchises and global chains dominate that quadrant and would out market you. Now do you have the sense to accept it. And for god's sake, post your god damn hours on the door and change out the Rossellini's sign on the shopping center marquee and hire some jack ass to wander around the parking lot pretending they just ate at your place and tell people how great it was. I'll be back to try some of the odd ball items, but, I wouldn't count on me to balance the books. Good luck.

St John's River Steakhouse and Seafood, Sanford *Canary Islands Travel Notes

I had lunch at this four year old restaurant (that has seen many masters) on Lake Monroe (on that island in town) on Tuesday. I've been here many times before and I swear I've even eaten here before. But thanks to the terrible search capabilities of this Google owned blogging application, I can't find any evidence of a review. Thankfully, the experience wasn't bad (if it was a redo). I had a soft shell crab sandwich for $12. Fries were a buck more. This was around the median price range. It was way better than I anticipated. The crab was a bit fishy tasting. I was expecting frozen anyway. However, the excellent corn meal crust and proper cooking time made up for that. The glossy bun was also a bit more than ordinary. The veg weren't terribly unfresh. The spicy remoulade wasn't exactly original. but, it always adds something. The fries were real show stoppers. I think they call them (not on the menu description) "curls" or "scoops". They were like a section of a curly fry. But big like a wedge. Something this thick is usually miscooked. These were not. And even had some crunch to the exterior. I ordered this because I was getting a vibe (from the ram shackle interior and magic markered out items on the menu) that this wasn't a serious dining establishment. I think I was wrong. I think you can venture out into the more expensive parts of the menu. They have things like shrimp and grits, fish and chips, burgers, steak, seafood, etc. Platters and sandwiches. The interior is mostly wood. They have the screened in patio (like all the others had). Most tables have lake views (for one half of the table). They have a bar. I know they have live music sometimes at night. Service was very attentive and personable. Demands were anticipated. It's a taste of Florida type joint with better food. Tourists (especially) should like the experience. Soda was near the danger zone. $2.90.

*I noticed that a new food hall is going up on 1st St (I think that is the main one into town). It was called Henry's Depot, I believe. A bar in back had opened a week ago (night) and four of five stalls were being built. A Mexican, Some Guy's Sandwiches, Pizza Oven and some other things. And the F&D Italian sign was down and no F&D visible. I wonder if they chickened out. Hollerbach's extension is complete. An old age home is going up next to St John's River restaurant. I thought it was a hotel. They are building some more buildings around Fuel. I used the roll they gave me for a smoked chicken order the next day on my tuna fish sandwich. The smoke it absorbed worked well with the tuna fish. I also add hot sauce to my tuna. That may be a necessary element for the smoke to work. I'm not sure if I've seen smoked bread out there.

**Travel Notes - Canary Islands (and Spain since they own it): BK has a double cheeseburger with three slices of cheese and a cheese dipping sauce. Why don't all places have a cheese dipping sauce? I'll trade you Sweet and Sour. McD's had little fried chicken balls called McBites. Way cheaper than nuggets. 20 were 2E. And an Alfredo Truffle Sauced Burger. A place called Ballshakes had a mason jar milkshake that they crowned with a jelly or cream donut (straw through the hole). I had a pork cheek muffin. It was a crown/base of fried phyllo with pulled pork cheek and jam in side. Made me thing of many savory things we could start putting in a real muffin. I also saw a salmon and almond sandwich in the airport in Barcelona. It was in a wrapper, so, I'm not sure how they did it.

Grub Crawl - International Drive: Hi-5 Poke, Spicy Girl and The Mexican Camel

I tried these places in a strip mall at Kirkman and International Drive two Thursdays ago. I ordered these items to go. The first two are in the same location. The third is next door.

Hi-5 Poke and Sushi - They had a larger menu, but, they told me they are just doing poke ($12) going forward. I had tuna nachos for $8. The tuna was surprisingly fresh. I forget how long they have been operating. I think under a year. The place is Hawaiian themed. Looks sloppy. Partly because they are running a Szechaun restaurant out of here as well. I hope I'm not outing them by telling you about it. You would think that violates their franchise agreement or lease.

Spicy Girl - This would be the draw (if there is one). They have all kinds of crazy dishes here. Lungs, lips, claws, feet, jaw, chin, gizzard, neck, ear, stomach, liver, intestines, wings, etc. I was taking a flight the next day, so I wussed out and ordered spicy beef noodles. They were good. The beef was very tender. And I'm not sure how to describe the noodles. They were very overcooked. I think that might have been partially my fault leaving them in the "sauce" all day. They were very spicy and a bit oily. I only ate around a quarter of them. Not sure if they or the next place's meal gave me the intestinal discomfort that I luckily got rid of in a unfortunate bath room stall before the longer leg of my plane journey. I may go back to try some of those oddities. They had some normal stuff as well. Their English wasn't great.

Mexican Camel - This was a disappointment. And it is a shame because the manager was very generous. He gave me free baklava and a drink (homemade lemonade with some flavoring I forget). The baklava tasted like olive oil. Hopefully, that is not why it was free. The place is just a "Subway" that does Med and Mex. Not an interesting fusion. You can "cross pollinate" your dish, but, that isn't very inventive. You chose the container (bowl, pita, tortilla) and the main (lamb, chicken, etc) and then add sauces and toppings. I had lamb in a pita. The lamb was just meatballs off a skewer. They were poorly made and crumbled. I screwed up the toppings with harissa (very hot) and tahini (bland) and pickled onions and turnips and tomato and pickles. It was too bitter and something gave me record setting gas. I mean it reminded me of the throw up scene with Lard Ass in Stand By Me or the one in Team America. Except this was air (oddly odorless) and it came out of the out door not the in door. And not just a single tuba solo.. The last time I had these symptoms was when I ate at that Med place on 436 (Gyro something). So, I think it's something wit that kind of food. Pickling? Root veg? This is a one off that looks like a chain. I think they are six months old. This is case where one plus one doesn't equal three. Or even two. If you want Mex go to a place that does that. if you want Med, same advice.