Rivership Romance, Sanford

On Wednesday I had lunch aboard this cruise ship for a little over $40 (with $7 coupon that basically negated the tax and port fee). They served some cheese, crudite and sweet rolls as appetizers (all you can stomach). We then had some time on deck. Then there was a typical salad with some sort of Italian vinagrette and rolls. The main course was cornflake and panko dusted Celery City Tilapia with roasted potatos and a medley of vegetables (yellow carrots again - is it a conspiracy?). All in all it was better than I expected (I'm rating it as a 20 dollar cruise with a 20 dollar meal). The fish was large and well cooked. Unfortunately, it was covered with too much of an unecessary mayonaise based sauce. The potatos were a little over buttered. The vegetable were ok for unsteamed. The served a brownie for dessert. The service was good. Although, I still don't know why they call everyone down from the upper decks if they're going to make you wait as they serve stewardess style. I hope they have more than two servers on the other cruises (we only had about a half full tour). Ice tea, coffee, or water are complementary. They have alcohol, beer and soda for a charge. You are offered a chicken or beef or vegetable or fish or pork entree. The two specials were fish and beef on the day I sailed.

The boat is a little seasoned. It has gold trim, red pleather booths, fake Tiffany lamps and a plentitude of mirrors. I would guess it seats 100. It's air conditioned and mostly enclosed. It was bigger and more enclosed than I thought (so don't worry about sailing in the heat or rain). The silverware and glasses were a little worn . The table mats and napkins were paper. Ask for the right side of the boat. It had the better view.

All in all this was a fun experience. I did the shortest tour (3 hours). You had to be at the dock by 10:30. We left at 11 and returned at 2. It's a cheap getaway and the food will be better than expected. It's not the Queen Mary but I think it's exactly what their demographic clamors for . It was mostly an older crowd and their young relations who boarded with me. Most were celebrating some kind of anniversary or birthday. They had an MC who furnished some good info (who new the St John's is black because of tannins from Cypress trees). We probably could have done without his karoake on the ride back. We saw alligators, snakes, manatees, birds and other flora and fauna on our ride. It may not live up to the expectations of some snobs, but, I found it a decent value and I ask the snobs of Central Florida to slum it for an afternoon or evening and I think they will be secretively satisfied. Where else can you get this experience locally? Unique(ness) is hard too find.

Club Crawl - Longwood : Liquid Scrips

Don't ask me how I wound up there. It's a psuedo-biker bar with go-go dancers and shot girls. There weren't many girls there, but, the drinks were cheap. It's in the spot on 17-92 where McGinty's used to be. I decided to leave early before I ended up in an apartment complex trying to keep it down so the baby wouldn't wake up.

Hugo Joe's, Oviedo

I had lunch at this restaurant on West Broadway on Friday. I had the French Dip because I didn't feel like carbs or grease. It was the special and it was $6.99. I was astounded by how much I liked it. All the ingredients were fresh. I was a little suprised to see melted cheese on top of the beef. But, it didn't ruin the sandwich. It came with mixed vegetables (my choice of side). Only the brocolli was over cooked. It had yellow carrots! Pretty atypical for such a place. The service was prompt (and cute). The decor was a little bar roomish. They had some interesting Swiss entrees and some seafood (oyster po boys!). I believe the spot used to be Frankies and more recently - Victorio's (that what the receipts still say). The crowd was very local.

Club Crawl - Brix (Closed) and Sky 60

9pm-12pm: Brix. Nothing new. OK crowd. They all left before 12. *They are no longer on Rewards Network.

12pm-1:30am: Sky 60. Pretty empty until 1am. I only stayed because while walking around Orange I saw that this night was a lost cause. I chose this spot because it had been a while and it's outside. I didn't want to waste one of the last cool nights we have left. The place reached it's usual quota of beaners early on. They love that Miami Beach linen cabana exterior. It became more mixed later on. I think there was a high school reunion of girls from Lakeland or Winter Haven going on. You can always spot the trailer park hair and clothes. It was uncomfortable to see the needy prom queen running around taking photos with everyone (even the dweebs who seemed uncomfortable to finally get an audience with the mean girls). Not that the girls were pretty. Just "Winter Haven pretty" I guess. The (1!) bar was a complete joke. It took over 20 minutes to get a drink when there were only about 20 people there. I didn't dare try once it went past 21. It's a sin that they can charge a cover for this place. But, I think it's the only incentive you have to stay so they must need it. My favorite patron was the aging Latina in knee high boots (have they been out so long that they're back in?) doing a tranced out, waving her arm behind her back like she was dispersing fart odor dance. She was doing the requisite left right dance that seems to be the only sanctioned move that her race allows. Tune into Univision or imagine some shitty trumpets playing a polka if you want to experience what I'm talking about. It makes the white man's overbite seem inventive in comparison.

Gargi's, Orlando

I had dinner at this Italian restaurant on Saturday. I had the Strachiatelle (sp) for $6. It's Italian Matzo Ball soup. It's chicken broth with noodles and lots of egg whites. It was very satisfying. I had Lasagna for $14 as an entree. While visually appealing (not cut from a pan), the pasta was way overcooked. It was pastey. I think it may have been re-warmed because it was overcooked without arriving hot on my plate. It was also bland. I don't think they spiced the dish at all. The meat was grey so I originally thought it was veal but, it might have been beef that had the blood boiled out of it from it's own juices during baking. The cheese was flavorless too. The service was polite. Although, it was subject to an unfortunate criticism that I'm having to assign more and more of these days - understaffing. There were only two waiters for the dinner service.

The place is on a lake and it was a beautiful setting for this time of year. It's on that lake in between Princeton and 50 on the good side of town (N.Orange). It serves about 30 tables. The place was about 1/2 full. The crowd was eclectic. Yokels, bourgeosie, gays, women who booze, and a some kind of youth church group were there on Saturday. The best story I overheard was a yokel lionizing the comedy and intelligence of Jeff Foxworthy. The gay couple next to him were forced to put down their cancer sticks for a second in order to savor the moment. The place is clean. The silverware is clean. The decor is an afterthought. I would recommend it for the view and hope that your muse just ordered the wrong thing on the wrong night.

That Deli, Lake Mary - Closed

I had lunch at this sandwich shop on Monday. I had a curried chicken salad sandwich on wheat with a side of mac and cheese and a DC for $9. The place has a hippie dippy feel. Lots of autographed photos of soft rock artists. The sandwich was fine. It came with alfalfa sprouts, onions, cucumbers and tomatos. They all were fresh. The mac and cheese needed salt. It's in the spot that was Nick's Pizza then some other sandwich shop. It has a counter that seats about 8 running perpendicular to the entrance and about 4 tables to the front of the shop. The staff is a bit cloying (but at least it's not a false enthusiasm like a "welcome to moe's). It is very clean. It's self serve.

Stone's Throw Bistro, Sanford - Closed

I had lunch at this restaurant where Da Vinci used to stand on Wednesday. I had a cheeseburger with home made chips and a beverage for $9. The burger was well cooked and came with field greens, gouda cheese and fried onions. The meat was sort of meat loafy (which we agreed was caused by the Worceister marinade). It wasn't bad or good - just different. It came in a large, fresh roll. The place has obviously not been washed since the days of the Pony Express (which is what one imagines when one enters this saloonish environ). The only decorative change is the local art pimped out on the walls. There is no underlying message with the decor. It's dark and eery. The service though extremely polite and working at full capacity, needs some attention. One person can not handle 30+ patrons. I waited almost an hour. Other tables had to ask for their meals to be wrapped up because their lunch hour had come and gone while waiting. Hopefully, they can add people as business picks up. It feels like friends and family now.

All in all this is a foodie place. The chef/owner obviously cares for nothing except the food. I would try his impromptu wild game nights if you can stomach the $60 entrance fee. They are probably good. They also have a nice selection of obscure micro brews. Let's hope they get enough patient devotees.

El Rancho de Anibal, Sanford - Closed

This supposed gem of an Puerto Rican restaurant on Sipe Ave (that was only open on the weekend) has closed. Thought I'd save you the trip.

Bella Vita, Lake Mary - Closed

I ate lunch at this Italian restaurant in Lake Mary (where Mario's used to be) on Saturday. I had the Chicken Parm sandwich for $7. I know you are waiting for the pain to come (mid-price Italian), but, I actually found the sandwich to be among the best, if not the best, I've ever had (and I lived on them in my teens). So how can this be? It starts with the bread. A large, wide, flour dusted, artisinal loaf. Light and slightly crusty. The chicken was real in taste and form (not pounded flat chicken spam) and not drowned in sauce. The sauce was light and fresh. The chicken was not oily or over breaded. The mozzerella was pulled over the chicken like a thin bed sheet. The service was perfect (although it was sadly empty). They have redecorated the place with a rustic (autumn colors) sensibility. It still suffers from a hallway-like floor plan that looks out on the working elements of the restaurant (even the bathroom area is visible from most of the restaurant). They tried to break up the flow with half wall, but you can only do so much with what you're given. They seem to have a wide if not imaginative menu. They keep a fair selection of wine and beer (most on tap). It goes to show you that I'm right about shitty Italian frauds. The prices are the same as Marios, but the food and atmosphere are infinitely better. They said they have an outpost in Deltona too. Tip - slices only at lunch.

I would suggest that they figure out a way to make the open kitchen a curiosity instead of an eyesore. Maybe dress up the kitchen or frame it with some decoration. Same with the other exposed doors on the kitchen side. I would also try and hide (curtains) the rest room area. I might also trade in some of those grand ma, reproduction Italian type signs and decorations for some real Italian point of purchase collectibles. It would give it an edge and make it look less like an American chain's idea of what an Italian restaurant looks like. I would also push the contractor to get me my sign and figure out a way to draw people in (a pusher on the street, a placard, music). I would also contact the sheriff and start towing all the bike riders that steal my customers spaces on the weekend.

* I went back recently and the pizza was atrocious. Not baked long enough and too much flour in the dough. The cheese was also salty and didn't melt well.

Journey's, Longwood - Closed

I had lunch at this highly esteemed restaurant in the Boston Market strip mall in Longwood on Friday. I had the Duck Confit on a bed of rice for $12. The duck meat was good if skinny drum and thigh (must be free range). The skin was not crisped at all. The chef said he was taught to do it this way. I don't eat the skin so it wasn't a problem, but, I've never seen a confit prepared this way. The rice was nutty in taste and texture (though not wild). It was paired with bits of lightly warmed vegetables (asparagus, squash, carrot). It came in a orange citrus sweet and sour sauce that had a little kick. I would advise eating the duck on it's own as the sauce overwhelmed it's flavor. The place surprises me for such a darling of the foodie circle. The menu was about 8 deep (4 salads, a burger, steak sandwich...). Nothing intruiging. Even the special was just a fried fish sandwich. The room at the entrance is always kept as if it is a store room. It makes it seem like they're constantly moving in or out. The place is small. There is nothing spectacular about it asthetically. Yellow walls with pictures of famous edifices (that I guess you would see on a "journey") and a black cieling with track lighting. The service was good and pleasant (2 for 32). The silverware was clean. The bread was fresh (served with tapanade in olive oil). It was fine not amazing. It was about 1/3 full. Mixed clientele.

I would suggest they clean up the space and push the envelope gastronomically. I like the fact that you turned the speakers away from the guests.

Fujiyama Sushi, UCF Area

I had dinner at this Japanese restaurant on University on Saturday. I had the Chicken Teppan for $12.95 and a Yellow Tail Roll for $6. I was engorged by the end. They must have cut up 2 full breasts of chicken for my meal. Add in lots of mushrooms, squash, broccoli and a pile of fried rice. It also came with Miso Soup (flavorful not watery) and a proper salad (mushrooms and carrots not just lettuce). I was forcing it down before I started the roll. It was ok. Lots of fish but it was pretty firm for Yellow Tail. The sushi was rice was a little pastey. The place is erected in your typical Japanese "order from a catalog" style. Vietnamese and Chinese girls stroll around in kimonos. The service was good. The place was clean. It was about 1/4 full (8 of 32). Good value.

Cafe 118 Degrees, Winter Park - Closed

I had lunch number 2 at this raw food movement restaurant on Saturday. I had the beet ravioli for $14 with a Beet Carrot Orange Juice for $5. The "ravioli" was pureed cashews (fake ricotta) seathed in a "fruit roll up" skin of beet. It came in a pear sauce. It was very inventive and slightly tasty. The juice was a little beety for me and these blended juices never age well (they must be consumed immediately - ie 5 minutes). It didn't go well with the ravioli. I think you need a sharp soda or mineral water to counter the veggies and nuts. The place was very clean and modern. It's very white with high cielings. The whole front is glass (a shame it's hidden on a side street with no view). They have pretentious "for sale" art on the walls. Is anyone else sick of multi-revenue streams? I want to feel like I'm eating a meal not attending a multi-level marketing promotion. The service (2) was adequate for the traffic (12 or 40 possible). I was surprised at the contrast in clientele. Although, I have the feeling that most of the men were dragged in their by their hippy, carbon toe print, secretively dieting, vegan, or earth mother table mate. All in all it's more of a novelty than a great restaurant. However, I suggest everyone try this type of cuisine at least once. It's something different. If nothing else you can appreciate the resourcefulness it takes to work with a limited palette. They seem to put alot of care into their meals.

Authentic Cuban Cafe, Winter Park

I ate lunch number 1 at this Cuban restaurant on Saturday. I had the Media Noche for $5.50. It was fine. The place is more of a lunch counter than a restaurant. They have the usual Cuban fare. They have about 6 tables of four inside and two outside. You order the food and they bring it out to you. Nothing fancy but they do what they do well. It was packed so the must get people coming to them (too hard to find by mistake - make the turn away from the train tracks at the middle light on Park). And who can complain about eating lunch with Rollins girls?

Club Crawl - I Drive : Shogun, Friday's Front Row (Closed), Bogart's (Closed), Howl At The Moon, Melting Pot

9pm-10pm: (Bar at) Shogun Restaurant. Came in for some Sake. They only serve that in the restaurant of which the bar is otherwise unaffiliated but fulfills all their drink orders except Sake. This place is really the bar for the attached hotel. Nothing going on. Doubt there ever is.

10pm-10:30pm: Friday's Front Row. Fine sports Bar. No action.

10:30pm-11pm: Bogart's. Nice chain-type mega restaurant/bar. Dead.

11pm-11:30pm: Howl At The Moon. Smoky mess. Big crowd of toothless rednecks. Didn't even go in.

11:30pm-12am: Melting Pot. Dead but to be expected. Knew the night was shot and wanted to cross it off my list.

I think Friday's is now a Kobe and Bogart's is now Brickyard.

Red Bamboo, I Drive - Closed

On Friday night I ate at this Thai restaurant near Family Fun Park. I had the Red Bamboo entree of shrimp on a nest of brocolli in the house sauce for $13.95. I inquired if it was a Thai dish and they said it was the chef's special dish (whatever that meant). The sauce seemed a little more Vietnamese than Thai. I think it had soy sauce, sugar, fish sauce and sirachi. It was tasty. There were about 10 shrimp (24's) and maybe 20 pieces of brocolli. The place was clean and new. They actually spent some money on authentic decor. The service was a bit in your face. Do Asian people come in knowing what they want? Here's a tip. If I'm reading the menu, I'm not ready. Another pet peeve. They were out of one of the two Thai beers they put on the menu. Don't list it if you can't keep it in stock. All in all it deserves better than to be empty on a Friday night.

Christianos, Winter Spings

I had a Caprese Salad at this Italian eatery/wine bar on Saturday. It was a big portion and the ingredients were pretty fresh. It has a nice ambience. The staff is cute and attentive. The place is clean. It's only open for dinner.

Aashirwad, I Drive

I had lunch number 2 at this Northern Indian restaurant off Kirkman this Sunday. It was a buffett for $9.95. It had about 10 items, salad bar, rice desert and Chata something (chickpeas, potato and the green sauce - cold) designated as an appetizer. I tried all 10 entress. The Chicken Tikka Masala was the creamiest I've ever encountered. The basmati rice was fine. The eggplant with lentils was good. As was the black beans, egg in curry sauce, potatos and lentils and Tandoori chicken. The chicken 60- something (amount of spices) was a little gamey. I don't like dark meat or bones. The place was very well decorated. It was full (80% Indians). It was clean. the service was good. It's in the strip mall holding Bill Wong's (overlooking Kirkman).

Taste of Hong Kong, I Drive

I had lunch number 1 at this Dim Sum restaurant on Sunday. Each plate was $2.95. I had 2 Har Gow (shrimp dumplings), 1 Shark Fin Dumpling (pork and Shark Fin), and 1 Chicken Feet. The dumplings were excellent. The chicken feet were confusing. I only found the skin eatable. The sauce was delicious, however. The place is pretty drab and old. The service was good. You can't criticize one of only three Dim Sum options in town.

White Wolf Cafe, Antiques District

I had a snack at this denizen of the antique district (in between Winter Park and Downtown on Orange Avenue) on Friday. I had a Peanut Butter Ice Cream Pie for $4.50. It's vanilla and peanut butter ice cream in a peanutty crust covered with chocolate syrup. It was fine. The place double as an "antique" shop so it looks like that. It's clean. The staff is young and presentable. There is a strong gay vibe. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It has your typical American fare and a bar.

Johnson's Diner, Downtown - Closed (Now McKnight's)

I had lunch at this "legendary" soul food establishment on Friday. Don't believe the hype. If it's the best soul food it's because there is no competition. And being the best soul food restaurant is like being the fattest Ethiopian. The place, though in a new complex, looks drab and old. It's decorated with black iconographia (pictures of Ray Charles, African wood figures) and nursing home curtains. The place is full of giggling men arguing over who's paying. This would be amusing except you know underneath the bravado they really can't afford to cover the bill. The crowd is about half and half white and black. It's not a scary or oppressive environment. They rotate items on the menu each day. I had the fried chicken with 3 sides. The chicken was good (although a little skinny). The green beans were from a can. The mashed potatos were from a box. The broccoli was all gone. I really can't recommend a place that skimps on key elements of their menu. They're living off being the only fish in a small pond.

*7/2/14 - Now called McKnight's. I expect it is the same experience.