Poke Joint, Lake Mary - Closed

I had lunch at this fireworks factory yesterday. It is in International Parkway in between AAA and 46a in a new strip mall. The first pyrotechnic display happened fifteen minutes after arrival. The second at 4:30am. And the latest at 2pm today. I'm not sure of the science behind such things. It wouldn't seem possible for something you put into your body to pass through (or push previously eaten items through) so quickly. However, I am assured that the 4:30 showing can be attributed solely to what I ate here. The only undigested scallions I had lately were from here. They came from the tuna poke bowl ($12). Nothing else I've eaten in the past few days had scallions. I know tuna can cause mercury poisoning, but, the Poke Joint seems to be exposing us to Freddie Mercury poisoning. An attack on the immune system.

They serve two types of tuna. One marinated and one plain. The plain looked so pale I had to go with anything else. The tuna was poor in quality. It was soft and flossy. Cheap tail cuts. I detected a fishy taste in some of the pieces that weren't overwhelmed by the marinade and the extra squirt from the piss bottle. If I cared more for my well being (or hadn't figured the damage was already done) I would have stopped eating and demanded my money back. The rice was no better. Dry as could be. I wouldn't be shocked to learn that they make it the day before and refrigerate (dry) it. That or their warming pot is set too high. They also do salmon. This is probably the worst of the six or so poke places I have reviewed in the last twelve months. So, needless to say it was packed. It seats about forty inside and ten outside. Order at the counter. They have been open for five months. It may be up your alley if you don't like the thought of an enema but need to cut weight fast.

*A pizza place (1000 Degrees) seemed to be opening next door on that day.

**Here are some items I sampled while in Australia. I'll put the region in after them if it is known or if not Australian. They have a lot of Asian restaurants there. Feel free to imagine my comments where they should be and then go and research what they are. A "#" will mean they said it was the national dish. Here we go: Chili peas (?), Golgappe (India), Lamb Rogan Josh (Kashmir), Musselman Beef (Kashmir), Barramundi tacos, Crispy Skin and Pork Belly Banh Mi (Vietnam), Ark Shell Clam, Pacific Kingfish, Dusk and Egg Jian Bing (China), Shanghai Noodle Soup with Smoked Fish (Shanghai), Prawn and Pork Soup Bun (Shanghai), Amok Trey (#Cambodia), Crocodile and Snow Peas (China), Sliced Donkey Meat Salad in Chili Powder (Sichuan), Battered Flathead, Crumbed Blue Grenadier, Stewed Pork Belly in Savory Sauce (Singapore), Japanese Fried Chicken (Japan), Hand Torn Noodles with scrambled Egg and Bok Choy (Xi'An), Pork Rougamo (Xi'An), Coconut Ice Cream with Coconut Chips in Avocado Puree (Vietam), Chicken Kottu (#Sri Lanka), Calypso Mango, Scallop Pie and Bruny Island Oysters. I also came across things like stuffed frogs, nitrogen iced coffee. wallaby and a chicken patty the size of your head (Taiwan) that I didn't try. Their McDonald's serves grilled cheese and gravy fries.