Taste Of Jamaica, Lockhart

I bought some curried chicken to go on Saturday at this Caribbean restaurant on SOBT and Clarcona Ocoee Rd. It cost $5.50. It came with white rice, a steamed banana and a boiled dumpling. The curry was tasty (not too hot). The chicken wasn't the best pieces of the bird. They have obviously never heard that you don't give a dog chicken bones because they will shatter into little shards at choke him. I know they haven't heard of this because they also don't know it applies to humans. And not only choking, but, cracking a tooth. Eating an unboned fish was less dangerous than this. The rice was fine. The dumpling was a rock. The banana was fine. The service was a bit slow for scooping a helping out of a pot and dumping it in a styrofoam box. They have some interesting (for a non-islander) breakfast items. Ackee and codfish, beef liver, callaloo and a daily porridge. They serve goat, stewed chicken feet, oxtail, roti, gizzards, cow feet, and of course jerks, fish, stews, patties and other regional items. A gold mine for the fearless. It's in an old fast food restaurant. They have decorated it. It seats about 100. They have take out and sit in (no wait staff I think). It's priced reasonably. I would guess people who know would say this is the best of breed. I've been to about six similar places locally so I'm not sure I have enough info to judge. But, it does seem to be the best in terms of selection and quality that I have been to so far.

FHSAA 6A Finals, Citrus Bowl

I saw Armwood Seffner (#2 nationally) beat Miami Central (#11) on Saturday for $12 ($10 for parking). I was one of maybe 100 locals there. Armwood barely filled their lower section. Miami could have filled the lower and upper sections if half of their fans weren't smoking weed by the food stalls at any one time (good job OPD). Shame on Orlando and shame on Armwood. Where is the love? Tampa is way closer than Miami, you have a nationally ranked team and you aren't using stolen credit cards to finance the trip. Why nobody from Orlando ever goes is a mystery to me. Does Orlando have that much going on that this can be poo pooed? It's not like it is a secret at this stage. I beg the people who hold this event to move it. I would be disappointed, but, it is ridiculous that people around here don't support it. I feel bad for the kids. Maybe some shuttle buses from downtown would help. The area is scary and maybe parking would be less away from the bowl. You could also then get in two games (by going to downtown in between) instead of one and the parking hit could be amortized over two spectacles. Maybe having it on TV is killing attendance? Maybe you need a blackout?

College Park Cafe, College Park

I grabbed an egg salad sandwich to go from this dive diner on Edgewater Dr on Saturday. It was $6.25. There was some confusion when I asked for mustard on it. They thought I meant instead of mayo and even though I thought I worked it out with the waitress, I got a chopped hard boiled egg sandwich without anything else. Needless to say it wasn't memorable. Neither is the place. Well not in a good way anyway. I only went in to knock it off my list. I'm actually reticent about reviewing it. I don't suggest you go. Why are there (4 to my count) so many dive diners on Edgewater Dr? It looks decrepit. It's overpriced for the basic fare they serve. Of course it was packed with gastronomic morons getting fleeced. It's run by Croatians (a propos of nothing) and staffed with immigrants from other minor Eastern European countries that you've probably never heard of. You would think they would serve something, anything regional. But, the hayseeds that eat there would probably eschew it. And like Forest Gump, that is all I have to say about that.

Kingfish, College Park - Closed

I had lunch at this self-described Italian Bistro on Edgewater Dr in College Park on Saturday. I didn't know Italians could have a "bistro", but, perhaps the Vietnamese owners don't quite understand European linguistics. It's not the only thing that is befuddled at this time. The menu is a typical, dull, medium-high priced Italian assortment with egg rolls, sashimi, buffalo wings, etc. Somethings are priced well. Most are overpriced (ie $4 for french fries, $11 for a small pizza, $9 for a calzone). I'm not even sure this neighborhood needed another Italian restaurant. And since only two other people were eating there while almost every restaurant around them was full, I think I'm right (and that is taking into account they are new and should have more lookey loos like me). I really don't want to bag on this place because the people seem nice and the service was good. But, why aren't you a seafood restaurant? I tried my best to make it one by ordering the Insalata de Pesce (grilled salmon, pine nuts, black olives, artichoke hearts on mixed greens) for $12 and getting them to replace the salmon with cobia for excitement. A side note - they said that by switching to parrot fish the price would jump $4, but, cobia was the same price as salmon. I checked at the market and salmon and talapia (another fish they carry) is $8 a pound while cobia is $16 (no parrot fish at the market). So I'm not sure if I really got talapia or they buy better than the market or they goofed. In any case, the fish was fine. Not a lot of flavor. I forget what it was supposed to taste like. There are so many fish out there now and they all are called by more names than the roads around Orlando. Pan "grilled". Not grill grilled. So it wasn't smoky. Not that I prefer that. The salad was a mess. It was small. It wasn't field greens. It was field green (romaine probably). There was; one bottled artichoke cut in quarters in each corner of the plate, four olives, five pine nuts, some onions, some peppers, and a syrupy vinaigrette. I mean come on. You can by a bag of field greens (assorted) at the market. I'm not asking for organically grown stuff from a ferret's cage in the back of a locally parked VW bus. Just respect the description you wrote in your menu. The place is ok looking (I would lose the neon beer signs). It is decorated close enough to its purported inspiration. It seats about 50. For a place that represents the value proposition that I like the least, it would be near the top because they seem to care. I would just have to be selective in what I ordered. But, if you are one of those legions of food zombies who love over priced Southern Italian flotsam, this poorly named enabler is waiting for you. I would act fast because I think it may be a limited engagement.

Kona Dogs Food Truck, Winter Park

I ordered a regular beef dog to go from this Hawaiian style hot dog food truck on Orlando Ave. It was $5. They have a shack next to Wet 'n Wild on I Drive too. They have three types of wieners (beef, pork, veggie). It came with a choice of three toppings. (Boy this is becoming suggestive. Can you imagine if Nature made that happen in real life? Three types of wieners that come with different sauces. Wait it gets better). Each sauce had options within the category. I just went with their namesake sauce (something sweet and garlicky). They put on way too much. Forgetting the caloric damage, it is just gross in large quantities. I think it can be substituted for K-Y in a pinch. But, after I wiped 90% of it off, it didn't ruin the dog. The dog was ok. It's rather obscene in its proportions. They shove it some kind of Hawaiian sweet roll that they hollow out the center of on a heated spike. I can't say I would go back for another, but, I wouldn't refuse one if I had to either. That's what she said.

Silver Bistro Food Truck, Winter Park

While driving home from lunch, I spotted The Winter Park Food Truck Stop for International Street Food on Orlando Ave (17-92) in between Maitland and Winter Park. It is now the "parking lot/open for business sometimes" location for dozens of our favorite food trucks. On this day (Wednesday), the Lobster Roll, Capt D, Winter Park Fish Co, Taste Buds (Venezuelan), Kona Hot Dogs and this truck were serving lunch. The Crepe truck and Swe-dish truck were there but closed. Lunch is 11-2 (I think). I also know they have a block party of sorts every Thursday from 6-10pm (I think) where every truck serves and they have music and seating.

The Siver Bistro is run by a nice guy who is trying his luck at the food truck business for the first time. He appears to have a steady menu (a permanent sign versus chalkboard) of four items; Miami Seoul (a Cuban with Kim Chi), a chicken something sandwich, a cheese steak, and an Elvis (pb with j or fluff and bacon). The meat sandwiches were $8 for a large and $5 for a small. The Elvis was $4. He also had a grilled cheese special for $2 and some other things. You can add a drink and chips for $1.50 (I think). I had the Miami Seoul. It was good without the Key Lime Aioli, great with it. The aioli was thin and wet. Almost a dressing. The Kim Chi was mild and dry. It didn't nauseate like it does in a taco. The ham and pork were fine. It came out fast (cooked to order). I tried to have just one bite before dinner, but, had to at least finish off half before my stomach would release my brain and I could concentrate on other things.

Rangetsu, Maitland - Closed

I went to this Japanese restaurant in the new housing development on Lake Lilly (Orlando Ave ie 17-92) on Wednesday for lunch. I was a little apprehensive about what it would amount to since there was a measurable time lag between when the old place on I Drive closed down and this one replaced it. Nothing to worry about. It's the same people (grandson) and the same if not better quality proposition. And it not so much replaced it as went in an entirely new direction. Gone are the koi ponds, zen gardens and the rest of the charicaturishly representational indicia. In their place is a hip, urban Japanese restaurant. The ceiling (air ducts) is painted black and stacked and serpentined to give the illusion of design. They are still ugly air ducts, but, at least they tried to incorporate them. They, exit signs, and staging areas ruin every dining room. Damn you OSHA or whomever. One side of the main room has glass windows. The opposite side has a "peer in" kitchen. The far wall has some interesting cut glass decoration over the booths to the left and a large corporate symbol over the sushi bar. The wall opposite it houses the bar. The places seats about; ten at the sushi bar, ten at the robata bar (at the kitchen), 16 in the bar, 40 on the patio and 100 in the main dining area. There is a nook in the back where they can draw curtains to make a private dining area. There are tables and booths (black leather or leather substitute) inside and wickerish furniture outside. The sushi and robata bar seats are white high chairs. The floor is dark. It's your typical monochromatic exhibition. OK. On to the food. I attempted to see both ends of the spectrum. The cheapest lunch option and some of their higher end sushi. I had the 2 Roll Special for $8, an order of Kampachi (to clear up the confusion caused by Dragonfly) at $4, and an order of Whelk Clam sushi at $3.50. I had spicy salmon and spicy scallop for my rolls. It is supposed to come "crunchy" style, but, they let me avoid that catastrophe. I'm usually not a fan of the mayo-infused excuse to hide the lips and dicks of the raw fish world, but, the quality of the seafood in these rolls was excellent and they didn't offer many alternatives. If these are the remnants, then the quality carvings must be incredible (by association - if a is to be then b is to c). The portions were large (8 large cuts) in length and the amount of fish in them was great. It would have been better if they didn't have the 200 or so extra calories from the mayonnaise (1 tsp = 50 calories), but, I've learned (from TV) that you can ask for spicy rolls without mayo (just the hot sauce). I still don't get why you would want to hide your product in mayo if it is going to be of that quality. Just do some regular rolls. The rolls came on a nice piece of rectangular, white porcelain with brownish ginger (I'm told ginger is dyed in different colors) and radish confetti. The special includes sunumono and soup or salad. I chose soup. It was a very nice Miso topped with two pieces of fried tofu skin. The whelk was ok. I believe it was my first foray. It tasted like a crisper squid. It came on a similar (smaller) set up as the rolls. A sushi order is one piece. Ok, now Kampachi. I looked it up. It is not baby yellowtail as another restaurant describes it. It is a fish called almaco jack aka songoro amberjack aka kahala. This version was much whiter than the pieces I had at that other restaurant. It had a little more flavor and was a touch softer than the other. I still prefer the slightly fishier taste of yellowtail. I wouldn't cough up the extra dollar per order. They have Kampachi Toro (belly) here too. The sashimi (2 pieces) came in a nice, glass dish with little cucumber pin wheels. The rice in all the sushi was properly prepared. The rest of the menu is great. They have things like; three types of shabu shabu (Japanese fondue), a robata grill (grilled skewers), individual hot cooking stones (for Kobe, etc) fish and chips, Japanese noodles fettuccine style, and plenty of other attractions. I like that they are trying to experiment within a classic construct. The place is new so of course it was spotless. Cloth napkins and metal chop sticks (don't point them at the person across from you). The service (6) was great. My waitress was perfect. The food came out in seconds. The other staff picked up the slack. The manager even came to clear my table and inquire about my satisfaction. They even packed up a soda ($2.50) to go. The one missed beat was the hostess. As usual this idiot is the weak link in the chain of another restaurant. And since this is the first impression all customers get, I encourage you restaurant managers to find a solution to this. So, I walk through the door and of course no one is at the station. I wander in to the main dining room to try and find someone to help me unload precious currency on overpriced fish taken from the sea for free. The first thing they do is try and pawn me off to the bar. I'm not sure if it is the sushi bar or the bar bar, but, the bar bar didn't even have anyone working in it at the time and was empty. I decline as I always do because get this - I would like to get the premium experience when I am paying the premium price. If you want to knock 50% off the bill I'll consider the bar. But, you guys say you need to charge that much because of the overhead. If so, then I want the over head over my head. So, I catch a little 'tude, but, I am shown a seat and told I'm lucky because one just opened up. The "one" was one of three tables they have for two people and I swear they would have made me wait in a restaurant that was 85% empty until one of those tables opened up. I hope the hostess isn't so big an ignoramus that she would have walked a sale rather than dedicate a table of four to one diner in an empty restaurant. I hope that is the order from up top (only seat three or more in a four). I hope that management adds a caveat to the rule and restores some sanity to the ossified seating process. But, I've been hoping for that for years. Notwithstanding an almost cataclysmic first impression, I fell in love with the place. It's in my top five for Japanese food. The prices were reasonable. The quality was excellent. The service was excellent. The selection was excellent. Parking wasn't a problem. It no longer evinces the Benihana/Kobe kitsch it used to, but, leave the kids at home and enjoy what a modern Japanese meal in an adult setting can be. It may not be a spectacle any more, but, spectacle can have a negative connotation too. Let the food be what you remember and not the fake Pagoda. A side note that may be of some interest to you (but probably not) - Rangetsu means Moon Orchid. It's what their logo represents.

Club Crawl - Downtown : Draft, Blank Space

I went downtown on Saturday

9-9:30pm: Draft - This place across from the Amway was in the news as one of those poor unfortunate businesses that needed our support. What they need is a personality transplant. The staff was sullen and unwelcoming. It's way too Hispanic. That doesn't scream "class" to potential customers. There is one white girl, but, she is an Eastern European. That doesn't help. The (lack of) sophistication totally clashes with what the place itself is trying to say with its interior design. Low class and bitchy is not the same as high class and bitchy. One has been shown to be socially acceptable and the other will not be tolerated by anybody who has more than a credit union debit card in their wallet. Unsurprisingly, it was almost empty even though there was a free concert for Gen Xers down the street and it is the only bar on the street and it was cold and rainy outside.

9:30-10pm: I listened to the Sugar Ray concert down the block. Who knew they had at least six legitimate hits. Not bad for free. Too cold and rainy to stay.

10:30-11pm: Blank Space - I grabbed one drink before I gave into my cold. The place is getting more professional and a few hot girls stop by every once in a while.

Nick's, Downtown

I had dinner at this Italian Kitchen (owned by the Funky Monkey folks) southeast of Lake Eola on Saturday. I had the soup of the day for $6 and the risotto of the day for $15 (very reasonable prices). The soup was made of potato puree and prosciutto nibs. It was delicious. It came in a nice bowl. They infused the creamy potato base with a large amount of coarsely chopped prosciutto pieces and a large slice for a garnish. It was the first soup I needed a knife for (to shred the prosciutto slice). The quality of the prosciutto was first class. The "Surf and Turf" Risotto was equally as good. The portion was huge. The risotto was well cooked. It wasn't bursting with flavor, but, that let the taste of the meats emerge more obviously. I enjoyed the lobster (large amount) more than the steak (large amount). The steak was a little tough and didn't have much flavor. I guess it's required to complete the effect, but, the lobster (like many artists in a group) could go solo. It came on a nice plate as well. They start you off with a bread basket and cold eggplant puree. The breads (olive, bread stick and a dense, sweet bread topped with crushed walnuts) didn't really bond with the eggplant. I believe they bake the breads themselves. The service (4) was excellent. It's a small place. It seats about 60. There were about 20 people there at 7pm. It's an intimate and refined setting (but not stuffy). There may have been music. There are no TV's like their Southwestern place next door. This is the place you go when you want a quiet, romantic evening. It does have a small bar, but, I think you would feel weird sitting there. There are photos of Italian landmarks on the wall. The support beams have tiles on them. It's not garish. They have half booths against the front window and tables in the center. My seat still had bread crumbs on it, so that is something they may want to look into. It is furnished spartanly. It has very high ceilings. It's a great place. The menu is small enough so they should be able to deliver consistent results. It still reaches a broad range of tastes. They have little "tweaks" to classic dishes that make it interesting (ie shrimp with penne ala vodka). I can vouch for the specials. I'm sure they will always be good. I highly recommend this place. I didn't want to like it. To be honest I resent when I have to go back to a space I've already marked off my list (especially when it is a pain to get to). But, this is definitely the best restaurant this space has ever housed (I think it's the third). The new owners of all the places on this block have bested the spots that they replaced. You should feel lucky if you live nearby and you need to find these spots if you do not.

Darbar, Lake Mary - Closed

I had lunch at this Indian restaurant in the original K Mart shopping plaza off Lake Mary Blvd (next to Einstein's) on Monday. It has been open for two weeks. The name denotes - "a magnificent hall where ceremonial gatherings were held and royal feasts were served to guests". That may be hyperbole, but, they did provide an acceptable buffet for $9. They served from left to right: salad, raita (yogurt), chutney, padam (wafers), chicken tikka masala, chicken in red curry, palak paneer (creamed spinach and cheese), aloo (potatos), two types on lentils, and basmati rice. There might have been one more vegetable dish. They also had a chicken dish that I believe was called Chicken Kalita. It was slightly breaded. It's not on the menu. They also brought out hot buttered naan if you asked. Dessert was included too - mango ice cream (I think) or rice pudding. I was too full to try. All the offerings were nicely prepared. The service (1 plus the manager) was good. The place is a bit stark. It is divided into two sides that are identical. It seats about 60. There were three other tables and a to go order in motion while I was there. It has booths on the periphery and tables in the middle. My booth was a little tight (and not because I'm large, 32 waist smart asses). I'm not sure if any other booths suffer from the same restrictiveness. The front window is severely tinted. I hope it doesn't scare people into thinking no one is home. The quality of the decor, seating and tableware is definitely reclaimed kitchen surplus. The menu is based on Northern Indian recipes (meat) with a nod to southern India via some vegetarian dishes. If the buffet is any indication, the rest of the menu (chicken, lamb, seafood, kabob rolls, tandoori preparations) is probably delicious. I was worried that the area couldn't support another Indian restaurant. But, since the other restaurant in town doesn't offer a buffet and since they have some unique dishes, I think they can survive. I'm always pleasantly surprised at the level of acceptance and familiarity there seems to be in the region for Indian food. Here's another option for you to chew on.

Which Wich, Sand Lake

I ordered a sandwich to go at this sandwich shop next to World of Beer in the complex that includes Morton's on Friday night. I love everything about it except that there isn't one near me. You order by first selecting a brown, hero shaped bag with the type of meat you want on it. There is a list of options that you check off on the bag. You then hand the bag to the cashier. They fill the bag. I had a 7 inch (smallest) Beef & Whiz (cheese whiz). My options were: hot or cold, bowl, size, extras (ie double meat), cheeses, mustards, mayos, spreads and sauces, dressings, onions, veggies, and oils and spices. In each group you have a number of choices. Every meat has different options associated with them. They even have weird things like Elvis' style PB and Bacon and Shrimp Po' Boys. The Psuedo-Philly Cheesesteak I made was $5. The beef didn't really cut it for a cheesesteak, but, at least they tried to be inventive with its application. I just wanted to see the whiz. The whiz and bread were good. It warmed up well the next day. The place seats about 40. It's new and fun. Everything about this place is new and fun. It puts the other sandwich shops to shame. Even if it is a little more, it is worth it. More options. I thinks they had soups. If you choose "bowl" it becomes a salad. They are open pretty late. They save copies of the newspaper for you to read.

Dragonfly, Sand Lake

I grabbed a snack at this Japenese style restaurant in the Via Dellagio complex on Friday. I believe it markets itself as an Izakaya (pub) style establishment. It was my first choice for dinner, but, they didn't seem anxious enough to have me so I tried one of the six other choices steps away. This way I could report back without making another trek here and stiff them out of a full meal charge. I had 2 pieces of Escolar sashimi for $5. They listed the fish as seared, but, I think it was cooked through. In any case, it was buttery. I also had two pieces of Kampachi (Baby Yellow Tail). it has been a while since I've eaten that, but, I could swear it was regular YT. It was very firm, cool and flavorless. I would bet it was poorly thawed YT. It was $6. They were out of Uni. The place looks great. It's very chic inside. It seats: about 20 at the sushi bar, about 60 in the main room, about 50 outside and about 12 in a semi private area. The bar is small (12) for a pub style venue. The restaurant is decorated in a lot of black. Very cosmopolitan Japanese with touches of antiquity. The menu includes items served on a robata grill (supposedly the only place in town with it). They had some interesting items (like yellow tail collar) to grill. The main lures on the sushi menu were some kind of specially raised or caught salmon, the things I ordered and one other that I can't remember. The beer was cheap. The wine was a dollar or two a glass high. The sake was way overpriced. I saw a cheap ass sake warmer in the bar, but, they didn't mention it on the menu. If that isn't what it is, sake will start setting you back almost $20. The clientele was natty. Pretty young and happening. The service was polite (hostess not included). I hate to say that I will have to eat crow and eat here again. I may even condescend to eat outside or at the sushi bar. Sadly, they aren't open for lunch. But, that's the sign of a flourishing restaurant, right?

Cantina Laredo, Sand Lake Rd - Closed

I had dinner at this "gourmet" Mexican restaurant in Via Dellagio complex (the one closest to Bay Hill) on Sand Lake Rd last Friday. I had the Fiesta Grill for $26. It was a sizzling skillet of shrimp (2), costillas (pork ribs) (2), quail (1) and little piles of carnitas (pulled pork shanks), grilled beef and grilled chicken. It came with rice, beans, guacamole, salsa, sour cream and soft tortillas. The shrimp were mushy and over cooked. The worst of it. They really need to be cooked separately and placed on top later. The ribs were tender (not much meat). They came with a sweet barbeque sauce on top. The quail was fine. A little dry, but, I'm not a fan of the wet and rubbery texture of undercooked poultry. They seemed to have removed the rib cage from the bird for you. The carnitas had a wonderful sauce. I have never had it come "on the bone" like osso buco. A great idea. Maybe the best thing. The little shank was so cute. The grilled beef was really grilled. We're talking jerky. But, I was in the mood for competing textures. It had a nice flavor. The chicken was also overcooked. It needed to be hidden under salsa, guac and sour cream in a fajita. The guac was ok. Let's hope their table side and house recommended guac is superior. The salsa was old and rubbery. Regarding salsa, they provided two types of salsa to begin with. A very sour one served cool and a smokier one served hot. I've never encountered a hot (as in temperature) salsa before. It was a novelty, but, I found myself gravitating back to the cool one. The service was great. Everyone was well dressed. I couldn't stop people from bringing me things. The soda alone was refilled with a fresh glass three times. It would have been more if I hadn't declined. They even changed the TV channel for me. My main server had a great attitude and didn't hide from the dining room. The place seats over 100. There is an outside patio (near a giant water fountain) that must seat 40. There is a large bar that must seat 20. There is a ring around the bar that must seat 20. There is an ante dining room between the bar and the patio that must seat 20. There is a main dining area that must seat 60. The main dining room and the ring around the bar have booth options. The main dining room has a central fire place. It was about half full while I was there. It was a mix of families and people on dates or celebrating as a group. The dress code was all over the place. The decor is modern. The place itself doesn't seem like it was constructed with a Mexican restaurant in mind, but, it is clean and new. My dish was the most expensive on the menu. Most are around the mid teens. Apps are few and close to entree prices. They have desserts around $6. Lunch prices top out at $13. The menu is a pretty good mix of old favorites and things we gringos should be moving on to by now. I suggest you give it a try. They seem to be happy to have your business and deliver good value for a place that will qualify as a fine dining experience. I almost assure you that you can find a good a table here without reservations at any time of the day.

Grub Crawl - Winter Springs : B2 Cafe (Closed), Hokkaido, China Wok

I went to these restaurants on Monday.

B2 Cafe - This place answers the question - What if Quiznos and Einstein's had a baby? I think they are shooting for a finer reputation, but, it looks and acts like a fast food joint. They serve sandwiches and breakfast. I had a TBCC for $7. It's turkey, spinach cream cheese, provolone with a side of "jus". The spinach cc must take the place of a spinach and artichoke spread. It was a good complement to the turkey. The serving was Quiznos size not delicatessen size. The "jus" was a terrible idea. It overpowered everything else. Maybe on the RBCC. All in all, probably better than the two places I likened them to. But, not enough to go out of your way for. They are in the strip mall at the intersection of Tuskawilla and Red Bug Lake (on the Thai Basil side).

Hokkaido - They have five hibachi grills and a small sushi bar in the back plus one smallish dining room. It's new. I had a salmon roll for $4.50 and a yellowtail roll for $5 to go. Both were great. They were nori wrapped and cut large and thin. Lots of fish. The rice was perfect. They are in the newish Wal-mart (lower profile version) strip mall on Red Bug Lake near Tuskawilla.

China Wok - A take out Chinese next to Hokkaido. What you would expect. I had a pint of shrimp fried rice for $4.50 to go. Kind of soggy rice. A fair amount (9) shrimp stuffed at the top of the box. Not many veggie pieces. They say they do New York Style. That can't be possible for two reasons. 1 - I saw no Mexicans working in the kitchen. 2 - New York is moving away from the Americanized chinese food they are speaking of for authentic chinese dishes. If they were serving those, they would say they serve X style chinese food.

Laramie Project, SSC

I saw the first matinee of this production on Sunday ($10). It runs through this weekend. I found the material as artificial and agenda driven as I did when I saw it ten years ago. It is and was a cynical attempt to win an award by dramatizing (what could have been seen as a simple robbery, battery and possible man slaughter case if there was no felony battery statute) an event that the media and special interest groups conflated into a hate crime once they heard the victim was gay. One can make this statement if you look at the percentage of the dialogue that is allotted to both sides of the argument. One side has about 95% of the words and the other does not. It's akin to the real life beat down the victim suffered. One defensive blow for every twenty received. The fact that they declined to investigate the protagonists' motives is also a clue. They told them (and America) what those motives had to be. It was the same with the media coverage if you were alive when the crime was reported. These kids got caught in the political correctness machine and were used as sacrificial lambs to scare potential perpetrators of hate crimes (although they did get life sentences without hate crime legislation). Not to say they didn't commit a reprehensible act. They did. Just not the one these authors wanted to write about. Or wanted to stop writing about when the evidence pointed a different way. Most of the evidence suggest that gay bashing was not the motivating factor behind the crime. It was money. The battery could have been explained as a self defense to sexual assault on the part of the victim. A much better play would have been a critique on how the media and interest groups exploit and repurpose an event to convey a message they wish to champion and how the legal and political systems disfunction under said pressue. That is an interesting, multi-faceted proposition. This is just a one dimensional effort in didacticism. They should have at least included material from the accused (ala Capote's In Cold Blood). The language (supposedly taken from transcripts) is also too clean to have been authentic. I wonder how they slanted the very words in the material in addition to using the power of parsing and selective inclusion to bend the story. Well, now that you have my views on the source material, let's get to the production. The set design is good. The acting was acceptable. The actors were prepared. Maybe next time they will get material worthy of their effort. Not just some poor excuse that doesn't really convey the anti-bullying or pro gay rights message they were looking to send.

For the record I am for the protection of every class of people. My issue is with the quality of the argument they stand behind. They deserve better than this. We all deserve better than this. This is not an issue that needs sophistry or self interested rhetoric. It can survive examination of all the points of view.

Big Daddy's, Sanford - Closed

I had lunch at this Drive In restaurant near the 46a intersection on 17-92 on Friday. It used to be the Rib Shack and was something else in between. It has been open for a week. I had a 1/4 fried chicken that came with fries, cole slaw and rice for $4.75 and a BBQ pork sandwich to go for $3.45. The chicken was juicy with a thin crust. It was freshly fried (20 minute wait time). It was a breast and a wing. The fries were crisp. The cole slaw was a bit sweet for me. They cut the cabbage in tiny squares. The rice was flavored with a lot or butter or butter substitute, dill and probably chicken stock. The pork was good. It had a touch of bbq sauce. The place expands its smallish (40 seats) dining room by serving people who park their cars in their lot. It's an old time car hop. The service (4) was attentive and no waitress is dedicated to only one section. They have fried seafood, ice cream, burgers, sandwiches, wings, and even chicken livers. The interior is decked out in 50's memorabilia. The structure is worn, but, it makes it feel like a "real' joint. It was about half full. The prices are low and the value is good. There's not much choice in the area, so hopefully they will succeed where others have failed. They only take cash.

Good Eats Diner, Deltona

I had lunch at this diner on Deltona Boulevard on Wednesday. I had the Eggs Benedict Special for $6. It came with home fries (other choices included hashbrowns or grits). It was very good. The eggs were poached perfectly. The canadian bacon had a lot of flavor. The hollandaise sauce was fresh. The one flaw was that they kind of drowned the plate in hollandaise. I'm sure some believe that more is always better, but, sauce can be like salt. Too much can ruin a meal. Fortunately for me, I could clear away their generosity with my knife. The place is in a strip mall near a Wells Fargo. It's an old structure. It looks like most small town southern diners. Sort of grandma-esque. It has white walls that have red wainscoting (is it wainscoting if there is no wood involved?). There is a central, square counter with tables around the periphery. Not much decoration. It seats about 35. It was mostly full. The service was quick and polite. They serve mostly breakfast with some burgers and sandwiches. The craziest they get is liver and onions. I doubt you'll be in the area, but if you are, you could do worse.

Club/Grub Crawl - Downtown : Sonoma (Closed), The Abbey, Frank and Steins, The Attic, Que Rico Food Truck, Whitewood

Last Friday

10-10:30pm: Sonoma - Had a drink at this beer-centric bar/restaurant in TP. They totally re-did this previously Miami-ish club space to make it look like a lodge. How this and the beer evokes Sonoma is anybody's guess. It was surprisingly full. Some customers said it was more crowded than usual. It is a pretty big space. Unsurprisingly (this will be a theme), it was mostly dudes. Even some dudes that dig dudes. No Cover.

10:30-10:31pm: The Abbey - Tried to get a drink at this bar/theater around the corner from Sonoma. It was being rented for a benefit. Looks cool though. No Cover.

10:45-11pm: Frank and Steins - Tried an awful sparkling sake drink at this pub/sports bar. All dudes. Seemed busier than I expected from a place that is hidden away a block east of Church and Orange. They have some food, but, it's an afterthought (the franks in their name). No Cover.

11pm-1am: The Attic - A large helping of dudes, but, some outrageously hot co-eds. Granted they dress and act like they come from UCF, but, at least there is gold to polish. The crowd felt like a fraternity's little sister pre-rush party. The music was good. The crowd was young. People were f upped. It was interesting. The one downer was that it became a pain to get served. No Cover.

1am-1:10am: Que Rico Food Truck - I had a Columbian BLT (La Perra) for $4. It's bacon, potato sticks, lettuce, a spicy tomato based and mayo sauce, pineapple, cilantro and pimento. There was a lot of bacon and i believe it wasn't baco-bits. maybe too much sauce. But, I liked it even if it sat in my fridge until lunch and had to be nuked. There are on Pine and Orange.

1:10am-1:20am: - Whitewood - I got their sampler platter and a lentil soup to go. The guy charged me $5, but, I think that was a late night/grand opening teaser rate. The sampler had hummus, babaganoush, a salad of parsley or mint, cous cous and tomatos and pita. All were respectable. I asked for a Fattoush salad, but, since I just looked it up and it's some bread salad I seemed to have been thrown a curveball. The hummus was a little bland, but, that may mean it had less calories. I have no use for baba so I threw it in with some dry packed chicken soup (hang over remedy) and it worked well as a thickener. I also tossed in the salad that remains nameless after eating half of it. I'm sure it was good whatever it's called, but, it tasted like pico de gallo and bitter herbs to me. Not on my must have list. The lentil soup was very thick with lentils. A little bland. The guys seem cool. It's good that that location on Orange (used to be a tattoo parlor) is in use again. The name is derived from the look of the burnt wood under the cooking surface. It's Syrian/Lebanese.

Prickly Pear, Thornton Park - Closed

I had dinner at this Southwestern Style restaurant near Lake Eola last Friday. I had their Apache Skirt Steak for $19. It came with a half a plate of fries sprinkled with a truffle "essence" and a fist full of crisp, thin haricot vert (perfectly cooked). The steak (diaphragm muscle) was cooked as requested (medium rare). It was a big piece, folded over on itself to fit on the plate. It could probably use an accent of any kind. I tried some of the butter from the bread basket and it helped. The plating was non-descript. The service was excellent. The place seats about 80. They have a bar area (which isn't really closed off enough to be considered a bar area), and a main dining strip on the window side. They have different seating plans, arrangements and levels. A reservation wasn't required. It was about half full at 9 pm. The crowd was mostly white and professional. It used to be some chi chi southern style restaurant that some quasi-famous local black female chef was supposed to rescue towards the end (see my old posts). It didn't work out. The space had been vacant for about a year. The people from Funky Monkey have taken this and a restaurant next door (Italian) over. Hopefully, that means stability (but you never can tell if the emperor really has any clothes in this industry). The whole block is revitalized again (see next post). The decor is hip-ish. They left most of the previous lay out and added some western touches. It's clean and urbane. The menu is more Colorado than New Mexico. There are only a few Mexican style options. They prefer things like elk and bison burgers, iron skillet chicken, duck, and the like. They have a similar (good) wine list to the other Monkey restaurants. They also serve a decent amount of beer. The bar has flat screens. Parking can be a pain. Not sure what else I can tell you about it. I enjoyed all phases of the experience and I encourage you to give it a try.

Grub Crawl - Downtown : Pine 22 (Closed), Downtown Market and Cafe (Closed), Kalbi Hau5 Food Truck

I went to all of these locations this Wednesday afternoon. None were worthy of their own post.

Pine 22 - One of these "create your own burger" places (ie Metro Burger). You basically pay more for food that is "supposed" to be better than fast food but never is. I had a swiss cheeseburger with approximately 20 really thin carrot slivers, two silver dollar sized lettuce leaves, 3 bean sprouts, and possibly some similarly minute slivers of cucumber (I didn't want to pick through to confirm that they were in there somewhere) for $7. The burger had little to no flavor. It was well done when I asked for medium rare. It was bone dry (ie frozen or man handled). The english muffin was the high lite. Or maybe the "to go" bag. I couldn't eat there once I saw what kind of restaurant it was. The place still retains the ambiance that the former restaurant established. It was a higher end full service restaurant back then. It seats about 100. It was mostly full. It is possible that this type of restaurant is the "sweet spot" for downtown. Mid-tier (think TGIF, Tijuana Flats) quality food at slightly lower prices because they 86 the staff. Personally, I had a better burger at a better price at the local sports bar on Monday night. And it came with a half a plate of waffle fries. I believe the menu was created by the woman behind Urban Flats (with some relation to Rusty Spoon). It's (the options) intriguing in theory, but, below standard in execution. The ingredients are poorly sourced and poorly managed once the come in. It is the Kim Kardashian of restaurants. Flashy, cheap and ultimately disappointing. They serve alcohol and some other food items. They must have cornered the market on wine splits. Pass.

Downtown Market and Cafe - I had a Waldorf sandwich for $7. Another loser. There wasn't much salad (chicken) on the sandwich and fewer grapes and walnuts in it. I don't recall tasting any apple. It rested on one sad, browning lettuce leaf. The place is cute. The only reason I stopped in. But, the food doesn't equal the setting. I bet it was developed for a gourmet coffee place (black wood and mirrors). The decorations (50's bric a brac) don't compliment the design. They leave out personal items (laptops and speaker boxes) among the tables. That and hand made signs on areas like the rest room door show that they have no eye for detail or taste. They have an interesting menu, but, I bet they don't deliver on the promise. If you have to go, stick to the meat-centric sandwiches. That way they can only mess up by having the wrong supplier or in the amount they offer you. It seats about 12. It's probably the farthest north of all the eating possibilities on Orange. They need a better name, signage and a clear view from the sidewalk into the cafe. Pass.

Kalbi Hau5 Food Truck - I had a quesadilla with kim chi and roast pork for $7 (the sign said $5 + 1 for meat). I have wanted to try this kim chi and Mexican fusion since I first heard about them doing it in LA. It's a disaster. The kim chi brings out the burntness on the quesadilla. The cheese clashes with the kim chi. The sogginess of the kim chi is a poor contrast with the dense pork. The pork was overcooked. A salsa topping was flavorless. Even the kim chi wasn't very good. Just a disaster. I now know Mexican food needs the contrast of fresh vegetables in texture, temperature and taste. I should have guessed as much since I hate the cooked onions and peppers they serve with some dishes. It makes it a gloopy mess. On the plus side, it took them over fifteen minutes to grill it and the truck looks dirty. They say they are at this location on Pine and Orange for 6 months. Lucky for us they seem to be out of most of their items when you try and order them. Pass.

Panchos, Orlando

I sampled a few treats at this Cuban Bakery and Deli on 436 on my way home from the airport last Thursday. I had an empanada with ham, turkey slivers and cheese for $3 and change. It was tasty and came in a shell that was more popover than empanada. I also had some kind of Baba au Rhum (a soaked cupcake). I can't recall what they call it. It was cold and tasted like diluted syrup water. Not very appealing. I also had a pastry filled with cream cheese. Also can not recall the name. It was a bit rich. I believe it may have been coated with powdered sugar. Jet lag. I finished off with what I think was called a Torrejas. I've been searching online for these items, but, can't track them down. It was basically a fried strip of French Toast twisted and covered with cinnamon and sugar. It was tasty. All pastries were under $1. The place has seating (30). It's more clean than I was expecting. It doesn't appear that you will get jacked or harassed by a cholo if you pop in. It has a decent assortment of snacks and meals. Try it if you are in the area.

Lido's, Orlando

I grabbed dinner to go from this old time (they say established in the 70's) Italian restaurant near Numero Uno (Michigan and South Orange) on Wednesday. I had a sausage and meatball parmesan sub with chips for $7. Everything tasted pretty much like it should have. Not great. Not bad. Just regular. The roll was poor. The weakest link. You really can't skrimp on that. It is just penny wise and pound foolish. The ingredients are too heavy to be supported by a fragile roll. The place looks like it is 40+ years old. It's a time warp. Maybe you like the kitsch. The mostly older diners seemed to. It seats about 70 in mostly tables of four. They serve all the old classics and champion an eggplant rolotini they call a Miguel. They do chicken, veal, and sea food a la piccante, parmigiana, francesca, marsala, florentine, spesatini, chablis, cacciatore, pepperoni, and pizziola. They have pasta, soups, salads, steak, desserts, etc. I didn't remember pizza. I'm sure it's an adequate old fashioned Italian restaurant. I suggest it for those who have a superficial relationship with Italian cooking.

Chai Thai, Orlando

I had lunch at this Thai restaurant on South Orange across from the SoDo living area on Wednesday. I had Chicken in Green Curry with a Spring Roll and Salad for $8. It was good. The salad was similar to a Japanese salad. Cheap iceberg lettuce with a grated ginger dressing. The spring roll was the same as it is everywhere. The curry was good. I think they like to make it hot because my "weak" even had a little punch. The chicken came with red and green peppers, carrots and bamboo shoots. It was served in a bowl. You moved it to your plate of basmati rice to eat. It had good flavor. The place seats about 80. It is booths and tables. It was about one third full. It sounded like they had a lot of regulars. The staff was great. Very hospitable and engaging. Everything came out fast. I think it is a family (Thai) affair. The decor is fair. The walls are yellow with sectional wall art. The weak spot is what is below and above. The ceiling clashes and seems a little dirty. I'm surprised because I thought it was a brand new building. I think this is a fine place to get Thai from a bunch of really friendly people. I wouldn't make a special trip, but, if you are in the area feel safe choosing this spot. They even have a few Chinese dishes. I wonder if that is why it is called Chai - Chinese Thai. Chai is an Indian drink so that makes less sense.

The Fantasticks, Seminole State College

I saw this musical on its final afternoon last Sunday. I saw it about 10 years back in its home theater on Sullivan St. I didn't love it then, but, I enjoyed this performance. I'm not sure if I changed in the intervening years or if casting more age appropriate actors was all that it took. I would like to think that the second act was too depressing for me at the time, but, I'm pretty sure I was just as morose back then. I remember having an e-zine where I made up the real endings of what happened to fictional characters in the years after the happily ever after. Yes I have been bloviating for that long on the Internet. I'm an OB. Back to the event. There are only eight characters in the play and one is mute. Discussing them should be a snap. The musical is based on the Romeo and Juliet-like love story of Pyramus and Thisbe. It pre-dates it. The lovers were good. The boy was a little old. He looked like a Guatemalan Matthew Broderick. I liked him better in the second act because I didn't really believe him as a boyfriend. The girl is just a freshman so she didn't look too out of place playing an adolescent. Her voice was good. She seemed like she might have been coached by someone who has a little too much respect for Disney musical theater. The parents were an odd pair that grew on you. One guy kept exaggerating his pronunciation. It reminded me of the way old timers used to act in musical theater. It was dissonant with the other performances and odd, but, it just endeared him to me like an otter with his head caught in the plastic from a six pack. The villain had a lisp that may have been caused by false teeth. But, likewise he made you like him. He had good presence and his voice was up to the challenge. The final two "accomplices" were fine. The old stage actor was played by an old stage actor. He hit the right notes. His apprentice could have been played by a walk in. My favorite was the mime. Not because the role is so integral but because she looks like that Scottish or Irish actress in Ronin and the Truman Show. She was in A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum last spring. I hope she will be in everything this year. Is community college two years or four? Let's hope she isn't too bright. Her role required her to be engaged throughout the whole show. It would have been easy to become bored with such a little part (especially after repeated performances). She played it perfectly. Subtle and attentive. The staging was minimal. This was a perfect type of musical for this venue. Thank you for resurrecting a fallen musical for me. The next thing they are doing is the Laramie Project (the play bill only said later this Fall). I found it a bit melodramatic and preachy when it first came out in the late 90's. Maybe they can change my mind about this as well. I would also like to congratulate the people who put together the playbill. It's much more informative and professional than in the past. It keeps getting better.

Sleeping Moon, Winter Park

I was going to grab a coffee, but, switched gears to a cup of Mushroom Brie soup and a coffee at this cafe behind/aside a gas station (I think it's a Chevron) Friday night. the soup cost $2.35. The coffee cost $1.50. The soup came with four slices of panini pressed bread. It was really good. It had mushroom slices and that great essence of Brie. A great combo. I thought the place was just a hipster coffee house. And while it is that (replete with live music), it also serves desserts, sandwiches, salads, etc. The food isn't just vegan. The have creative selections of turkey, ham, roast beef in addition to the tofurkey, veggies, grilled cheese, and fake meat. They even have a salmon salad (which is good now that Panera has discontinued theirs). All the coffee is roasted locally. It seats about 60. It was one quarter full. which is impressive because it is hard to see from the road. The crowd was mixed. A good looking young girl was just finishing her set on the keyboards. It is decorated with art for sale. It has tables. It was alot better than I had anticipated. I would recommend you stop in whether you are part of the hipster scene or not.

Chin Hua, Winter Park

I ordered some steamed pork dumplings to go at this Honk Kong style Chinese restaurant next to Rooster's (behind a McDonald's on Aloma) Friday night. They cost $5. The skins were a little pasty and thick for good Dim Sum, but, on par with what most places serve. There were six of them. They were just to ameliorate my appetite from the disappointing dinner I had minutes earlier. As I didn't dine in, my review will be quick. It is a sit down place. Not stylish. Similar to many utilitarian Chinese places. It seats about 80. It was one quarter full. The hostess/owner was nice. She said they have been there for sixteen years. Not a destination spot, but, probably adequate for your needs if you live close by. Fun Fact: Chin means Golden and Hua means China (according to the owner). Although you would think Chin would mean China.

Rooster's, Winter Park - Closed

I had dinner at this Global Kitchen in the far corner of a mostly untenanted strip mall on Aloma (halfway to Oviedo). The location should have been foreshadowing. But, they had advertised in some fanciful magazines and seemed to have some intriguing ideas. Oh, the best laid plans... I'll get to that in a minute. I had the "Sultan's Feast" for $16. Apparently the Sultan must have had Dexia handling his finances because what passes as a feast therein is 1 Koobideh (minced lamb and beef) Kabob and 1 Barg (grilled flat steak) Kabob with a char-grilled tomato, dry basmati rice and a hunk of raw onion. The Koobideh had no flavor and was tough. The Barg was actually good. However, it is odd that if I had ordered 2 Barg kabobs I would have paid $14. They charge you an extra $2 to get a cheaper kebob ($12) switched in! It came on a bare, white plate. The kabobs were thin. In any event, the food was just the tip of the iceberg. The place is in an inconvenient location. It is in a ugly location. It is decorated by an imbecile. It must have started out as a saloon/pub. That's the base. Then they added some Middle Eastern flair. Then they added video games! Like 20 of them. The place looks like Chucky Shia's. It's a hot mess. It seats about 40 in the lower level and 20 in the upper level by the bar. There were 2 sots at the bar playing video poker and a few loud families with kids running all over the place in the main room. There was no hostess or hostess station. I was served by the bartender in the upper section. I didn't even complain about the seat assignment because I could see this was already a mistake. A mistake I indended on extricating myself from as cheaply and quikly as possible. He was attentive. They have a hodge podge of meals that Gordon Ramsey would disassemble after the second round of commercials. They have Thai, Greek, Persian, American, Italian, Indian, Seafood, Steak and they claim Jewish (no evidence). They marketed a wood burning pizza oven, but, they said it wasn't in use. Not sure if that means ever. It's shaped like the face of a blond, mustachioed Viking. I kid you not. It sounded kitschy until I saw it in person with all the slovenliness around it. I think they offer music at times. I saw some old guy setting up something from his van. Then again he could have been delivering or picking up some more clutter. Or disposing of a body. I think they said the have a buffet on Sunday. It should be sumptuous because they are sure to have alot of uncooked food left over every week. Hope that they don't freeze it. You may think I'm being a little hard on them and maybe I am, but, I had high expectations. You would have to to justify the trip to this part of town. I think they thought their food would be tantalizing enough to get customers to this rent friendly location. I think they failed and now have to cater to the hillbillies that live around there. At least I hope they tried at the outset. I didn't get here when they opened in the Spring and I just wish I was as lucky this Fall. Pass.

Havana Cafe, Downtown (Closed)

I ordered two things to go at this Cuban cafe on the south side of the Suntrust building this Wednesday. I had a Cuban Hot Dog for $2 and a Pan Con Bistec for $5. The hot dog was microwaved in a bowl of water and looked and tasted like it. The baguette (the one they use for sandwiches) it came on was a step up from a bun. They put potato sticks and a sour Mojo (Mojito) sauce on it. It was a refreshing change of pace hot dog wise. The steak sandwich was thin slices of beef similar to what is used in a cheese steak. Sometimes this sandwich can be a big hunk of flank steak. I like it this way even if it may be less traditional. Less chewing and gristle. It also came with potato sticks and Mojo sauce on it. It was pressed. I enjoyed it very much. The place really doesn't have seating. You order and eat outside in the atrium or at your office. They serve breakfast. They have soups, complete meals, coffees, desserts and sandwiches. Two cute, young sisters work the place. It was better than I expected. I wouldn't ignore it if I work or live in the area. They have been open for a few months.

Rusty Spoon, Downtown - Closed/Rebranded as Elize (Closed)

I had lunch at this seasonal food restaurant near the train tracks on Church last Wednesday. I wanted it to be my new favorite location in all of Orlando and it came close. I had the soup of the day which was a spicy sweet potato puree with pecan brittle for $6 and a "Lake Meadow" salad for $9. The soup was a bit bland. I couldn't really taste the sweet potatoes. Mostly just a delayed hit of pepper that showed some proficiency. It definitely was not infused with dairy. The brittle was superfluous. It didn't melt (if was supposed to) and just became an annoying distraction that didn't help the dish. The "Lake Meadow" salad is a salad of escarole and spinach in a a warm bacon vinaigrette with chicken livers and a softly boiled whole egg. It was wonderful. The egg would be slightly overcooked for some traditionalists, but, I like the yoke somewhere between liquid and solid. The vinegar in the dressing was very light. You almost didn't notice it. There were gobs of thick cut bacon lardons. The chicken livers (not my thing but I'm trying) were silver dollar size and split in halves to create four pieces. They might have been a little soft. They have a strong, savory flavor that added a little panache. The greens were fresh and well washed. The portion was huge. Enough in itself. The constants through both dishes were a subtle hand on the seasoning, discernibly farm fresh ingredients and a bit of southern whimsy and ambition in the choices on the menu. The place seats about 80. I bet they could fit double that if they crowded the tables. The front faces Church St through floor to ceiling windows. There is a bar that separates it from a "room" in the back. There is a small intersection that has a view of the tracks and the waiters station. There may have been another interior room. The place is done up in a grayish earth tone with black and white photographs and abstract art that try to evoke that artisinal vibe you find in Napa or Pottery Barn. The ceilings are very high. The silverware is funky. The service was pretty good. All male. The prices were very reasonable. Even on the dinner menu, I think one thing was over $20. They say they change the menu frequently, but, keep some constants like a burger and fish and chips. They are about to change it for the Fall. And so why is it that it didn't become my new BFF? #1. A smarmy host named Douglas gave me the unceremonious affront of parking me next to the waiter's station in a half empty restaurant. After trying to pawn me off on the bar. I wasn't in a wife beater and cut off jean shorts. Let me say this once and for all for all you nearly retarded restaurant hosts: DO NOT EVER INQUIRE IF A SINGLE CUSTOMER WANTS TO SIT AT THE BAR IN A HALF EMPTY RESTAURANT. THEY DO NOT. IT IS NOT THE SAME EXPERIENCE AND IT IS AN INSULT! AND NOT ONE WE WANT TO SUFFER FROM A DOUCHE WHO HAS TO WORK AT (NOT EAT AT) SAID RESTAURANT. Assume that the customer's blood is bluer than yours. Which in this case is absolutely accurate. That single act erased a resevoir of good will. I had been waiting all summer to get back and try this interesting menu and I almost got up and left. #2. $3 soda. #3. The space. It's ok, but, it looks a little unfinished. They need a little more something before it gets a superior grade in that department. They need to hide that waiter station. It is an eye sore. #4. I think the waiters play pass the potentially small tip. I must have gone through three waiters until one stuck.

All in all, I love what they are all about. Sometimes this kind of seasonal, locavore nonsense can be pedantic. But, I just didn't get that vibe here. They weren't throwing it in your face or crowing about how "holier than thou" they are. I think they do it because it is a challenge and produces better results. I like the creativity. I'll be back. And the best part is if none of you like it I will probably get a healthier portion of "about to rot" locally grown produce on my plate. That's the good part about this movement. They don't freeze things for a rainy day if they don't get used. You get it, the staff gets it, a food bank gets it or Waste Management gets it. It rewards you for being a savvy eater. I encourage you to make time for this superlative player in Downtown. I'm trying to think of a better menu in all of Downtown, but, I can't. Pray it doesn't disappear along with almost everything good in this town.

Club Crawl - Downtown : Whiskey Dick's, Versus, Baby Grands, Touch, Independent, Boss, Brick and Fire Pizza Truck

9pm: Whiskey Dick's - There were about 20 people, one waitress and two bartenders in the old Brix space. They changed the space with a horseshoe bar (convenient). The decor is minimal. There were a surprising number of young, attractive girls for such a no frills locale. The Bartender was hot.

9:30pm: Versus - There were four people and one bartender in the old Clubhouse location. They totally redid the interior. Why? They never have any customers and are too far off of Orange to ever have any. The place looks nice, but, it's basically the same theme.

10pm: Baby Grands - It was about one third full and felt empty. It's on the second level above Touch on Church. A poor knock off of the enigmatically popular Howl at The Moon.

10:30: Touch - There were about forty people in this interesting club under the overhang on Church. The DJ was great. There were three male and one busty bartender. The bar surface lights up when you "touch" it. The space has a big, central dance floor, two bar areas, a patio and reserved seating. A cool atmosphere. Too bad I had ants in my pants and couldn't wait to see the promise of a full club after 12 come true.

12pm: Independent - The same hipster vibe that has been going on for years. It will be the same club 100 years from now. Too smoky to enjoy.

12:30: Boss - I believe this is the name. It's across from the new 7-11. This place which has been a billion things was now doing a retro thing. It was packed with all ages living an 80's flashback complete with original music videos. I've seen youngin's reveling in nostalgia, but, never like this. It seemed like they were yearning for a time machine. A hell of a lot of fun.

2pm: Brick and Fire Pizza Truck - Two young entrepreneurs have licensed the brand name and bake pizzas from their truck. I knew it could be done. I didn't love the pizza at the Brick and Fire I went to, but, I liked theirs. It was fresh and they add a little grated Parmesan on top for a little pungency. They are in the alley behind the Lodge aside the back entrance to Wall St.

(Friday 9/30/2011)

Chico's, Downtown

I had dinner at this Mexican restaurant on Central across from the museum in Downtown on Friday. I had 2 soft tacos for $7. The first taco was chicken with tomatoes, cabbage and shredded cheese. It was pretty decent. I don't love big squares of chicken, but, I can adapt. The second was a carnitas (little meats) which is shredded pork shoulder. It also had tomatoes, cabbage and cheese. This one had a lot of flavor. Cinnamon and maybe nutmeg. They were both well loaded and kept sanitary in a sheaf of aluminum. Both needed the table side hot sauce. They gave out complimentary chips and salsa. I was disappointed when I ordered because all of the fun stuff (short ribs, tongue, tripe) had been discontinued (yet not the menu that marketed them itself). However, I can say they delivered on what remained. It was a pretty small menu to begin with. Now it's basic. I think they have given up pretensions of being a restaurant and now just use food to service the bar crowd. It seats about 18 in tables inside the main room and maybe 1o at the bar. There is a hallway between it and Whiskey Dick's (that used to lead to the club behind it during some of its iterations) that seats about 20. A young crowd of all types. There were about 20 people there at eight pm. They have screens playing sports all over the place. The main room has two window view tables. The bar has a big, colorful menu mural that I believe lists their tequilas. It was hard to read quickly. There is a big iron tree in the middle of the main room that I swear I have seen in another restaurant. Is it new to the Ikea collection? The service was good. Maybe too good. I think they were expecting a bigger crowd. All in all I say it's a fine place to start the night out or have a cheap lunch. The prices are good. The room has some capacity to transport you. They have tequila. It's just a shame that what appeared to be an ambitious approach to Mexican cuisine did not seem survive the summer. Oh well, it's still better than another Tijuana Flats.

Coco Loco Cantina, Winter Park - Closed

I had some food to go at this Mexican+ restaurant on Fairbanks near Spatz Pool Hall on Wednesday. I had the (get this) 4 tacos with a drink for $5. It's one of five $5 lunches they offer. To put this in perspective, 4 tacos and a soda at Taco Bell is approximately the same price. But, at Taco Bell you get 1/4 of the "meat" (wasn't it proven they barely can claim meat). This is a steal and any self respecting college student or skin flint needs to get their ass over here before they smarten up. Back to the tacos. The ground beef was a little bland. It's like what you get when you try and make tacos at home. But, did I mention - $5! The owner said he hails from Buffalo and has recreated the Anchor Bar's (where they invented the Buffalo Wing) experience with regards to chicken wings (the + in Mexican+). I went there this summer and if they are anywhere near the same I demand that you go and try them. If we can get the Anchor Bar experience without having to go to Buffalo I will be recompensed for all these gratuitous, philanthropic posts. Pressure's on Coco Loco. The place is small. It used to be a barbeque place. I forget the name and couldn't get a result when I searched this site for barbeque or BBQ. I guess that didn't work out. I can't remember when 4 Rivers opened. Maybe that crushed them. At any rate, it's mostly the same layout. They said they re-did the floors this summer. They have TVs and and a bar and are trying every way imaginable to get customers. They have a gimmick/special every day. I just hope the location isn't a dead zone. It may be too far away from the school and offices. I doubt they want the riff raff that remains. The theme may also be too saturated. Maybe the wings can be the hook. Maybe they can get the Dads who have to watch their kids play lacrosse in the park behind them. Good luck. I know you are trying. Somebody has to respect that.

Cocina 214, Winter Park

I had lunch at this Tex-Mex restaurant in an alley off of Park Ave on Wednesday. I had a half order of the Cocina Chop Salad for $5 and a half order of the Mushroom and Spinach Quesadilla for $7. The salad had too much dressing that had too much orange in it. I couldn't taste the corn, roasted peppers, apple, tortilla strips or field greens. Which was too bad because it was a large serving (enough for a normal person) and orange was a poor substitute. The quesadilla was another story. Again a half serving was plenty. The tortillas were golden and not burnt. The mushroom and spinach provided a pleasing flavor and made me feel halfway health conscious. I would have probably preferred a less pungent cheese, but, there was plenty of it for those who judge it by that metric. The meal came with a tray of guacamole, pico de gallo and sour cream on the side. The pico was a little old, but, the guacamole was fresh and tasty. This was the first time I've had this combo and as a meatatarian I can offer my approval. Nice to switch it up every once and a while. The meal came with complimentary chips and salsa. The chips were a little over cooked. I believe they were un or lightly salted which is heart smart. They ended up serving as a third course (I recommend this manoeuvre) of "nachos" when I used them and the components on the "tray" as dips. The salsa was slightly spicy and seemed fresh as evidenced by the carcass of a tomato in the middle of it. That's what I call extra chunky. The service was great. The food came out expeditiously and consistently. Every course was well spaced out. They were all dressed in black uniforms. There were enough of them. The place is beautiful. They really spent some money here. There is a main dining area (80), a private dining area (?), an enclosed patio (40) and a bar area (35). The bar is separated from the other rooms by the hostess/welcome area. The main dining room is separated by the patio by glass doors. The place has every type of table configuration (2-10). It was about one quarter full. It is decorated in high Ranchero style. Modern yet traditional. It looks like every spec house in Scottsdale. The menu says 215 is the Dallas Area Code. Not sure if that is where they made their bones. The menu isn't revolutionary. Obviously, it's pricey for peasant food. But, you should be expecting it when you realize the town it's in and what the build out and overhead probably are. I would suggest you go when you want their "especialidades" not when you just want a taco or burrito. Those entrees will run you $20+. 3 tacos by comparison are $13. A little excessive. And that may be their down fall. I don't know too many people who crave Mexican riffs on filet mignon and seafood. And I do know alot of really good, "authentic" Mexican restaurants in the area that serve the "basics" at cheaper prices. And probably do it better or more to what people are accustomed to. I hope I am wrong. Try it. Just order discriminatingly. Parking may be a problem depending on the time of day.

I suggest they lower the taco prices and allow customer's to mix and match them. You have a better shot at satisfying a new customer with three tries instead of one. At worst, you won't reinforce a bad experience/selection. Deep six the beans and rice if you have to. Americans don't eat 400 calorie piles of diarrhea and also think rice is for Asian restaurants. The same with the $10 "choose two" lunch plate (no beans and rice). The tacos have avant garde names but not ingredients (except for the El Ronnie - duck). Get fully pregnant or not pregnant at all. And hire some cooks from Puebla (that's a region in Mexico not a competitor). It's a goldmine.

Lacomka, Winter Park

I took some things to go from this Russian Bakery and Deli in a strip mall on 436 near Yae Sushi (where they won't serve you one of their goldfish in a tank no matter how much money you promise them) on Friday. I had an order of Blinchiki (3 Russian pancakes rolled with ground beef) with sour cream for $4. The pancakes were slightly thicker than a crepe, freshly made and tasty. The beef and sour cream had little flavor. But, Russian food is not exactly famous for its intensity. I also had an order of Borshch (their spelling) for $4.50. Their version is meant to be eaten hot and contains beets, cabbage, carrots, potatoes, onions and beef. Don't confuse it with the beet only cold Borscht. It was adequate. I also had a loaf looking brownie (2) with walnuts that seemed like it had a dusting of minced Cocoa Peebles on top for $4. It was ok. Lastly, I had a commercially produced cheese ice cream bar called Dadu for $1. It tasted like cheesecake and didn't melt in the heat like ice cream. It could be something for the ice cream conglomerates to look into. The place has four tables in the corner where you can eat. It is more of a market/deli. They say they've been at this location for ten years, but, this is the first time their signage caught my eye. I can honestly say it is the best Russian restaurant in Orlando that I've been to. Wait for the rim shot. It is also the only Russian restaurant I've been to or I think exists down here. Some of the dishes state that they have Georgian spices. That and the dark hair and beauty of some of the staff leads me to believe that at least some of the dishes may not be traditionally Russian. And by traditionally Russian, I mean pre Peter the Great. I bring this up not to disparage the more recently but now independent annexed portions of Russia or start a debate as to who is a "real" Russian but to illustrate that you may find a larger selection of dishes than you would expect if I told you this is a Russian restaurant. Holy run on sentence. They have a pretty well stocked pantry with items such as: wild honey, Kvas, herring, pickled what not, pirogi, cheese, dried meats, etc. If you have some Russian heritage or are just curious, I say give it a try. It's not the tastiest food on the planet, but, it will give you an appreciation for what is. Plus it expands your consciousness. They have some sandwiches that have potential.

I suggest they market the fact that they are Russian and a restaurant more aggressivelyon their lit and store front signage.

Thai Villa, Winter Park

I had lunch at this Thai restaurant near a Dance Studio on Aloma last Friday. I had Tom Kha Kai which is a spicy, coconut milk based soup that I chose to add chicken to. It was $3.50. I also had a Thai Beef Salad for $9 because they were out of Chicken Rolls at 2pm. The soup was fine. I could do without a mouth full of bay leaves and lemongrass husks. But, I guess they want you to know how it's flavored. The Thai Beef Salad was ruined by the ignoramus who saturated it with the salt/rice powder/chili condiment that they season it with. The beef seemed to be cooked as warranted. The quality was typical for this dish (which I always think is overpriced for flank steak). The portion was smallish. The biggest complaint I have for this place has nothing to do with cooking. It is about effort. It seems like they have a "take it or leave it attitude". This must have been about the fifth time I tried to get served at this uninspiring, hovel in the middle of a ghetto (the bad side of Winter Park where even the street changes its name out of embarrassment). There was always a problem. They close at 2pm for lunch. They close at 9:30pm for dinner. They are on vacation. It's 5pm and they haven't opened. Always a hassle. This time they almost didn't seat me (and turned away another group of 4) because it was a quarter to 2. Then they rushed me through the ordering process. But, still found time to try and up sell me and add on. Look you aren't doing anyone a favor. You are providing a service. A service that we don't need. Maybe at one time you were the only Thai place around, but, now they are ubiquitous. I suggest you decide whether you want to run a business or not. If not, please hand over the reins to someone who is not afraid to work. The place seats about 40. They try and make it seem like you are in the middle or outside of a Thai palace. They really can't do much with the decrepit location. It looks worn. The food may be good when you aren't inconveniencing them. However, I would only suggest those who live near by to bother. If you don't live in the neighborhood, I would suggest you patronize your local Thai restaurant. It's Thai food after all. Not exactly a difficult feat to pull off.

Junkyard Barbeque, College Park - Closed

I had lunch at this barbeque restaurant/bar where Roly Poly used to be on Wednesday. I had a half Brisket dinner for $10. The brisket was ok. It was a little cold so I can't vouch for how recently it had been smoked. The smoke flavor was a little uneven. The pieces that appeared to be more in the center of the brisket (wider) didn't have much smoke flavor at all. Most pieces did have some fat. Which can be a requirement for some, but, can be a sign of poor pre-trimming or lack of low and slow cooking technique. The portion was large. It was about 7 or so finger width slices. More than enough as a full portion for lunch or dinner. They were served bare. They give you three choices of Carolina inspired sauces (Sweet, Sweet and Slightly Spicy and Mustard). The dinner comes with a choice of three sides. I chose cole slaw. It was a vinegar based dressing with a touch of mayo. It was the way I prefer it and helped break up the savoriness of the meat. I also chose Ho' cakes. It's just fun to say. Ho's gotta eat too. They are two palm sized corn pancakes with jalapenos mixed in. Very good. The final side was mac and cheese. I didn't like it. It seemed old. The pasta was overcooked (either originally or upon subsequent reheats) and overworked (when they keep stirring it so often that the pasta disintegrates). The cheese blend (gouda and sharp cheddar) made it taste rancid. I'm sure they were trying for something that would cut through the beef, but, it didn't work for me. The plating was a bit spartan. The brisket was served on a white dish with the Ho' cakes and the sides were in styrofoam cups around them. The place is similarly unpretentious. It looks like a bar. The floors are cruddy and scratched up. The booths are ratty. There is alot of junk strewn around the environs. Nascar memorabilia decorates the walls. It has a bar on one side that seats about 12. The left side is booths (about three of them). There are some seats in the back hallway that appear to be an afterthought. There were three other people there while I was there. The service (1) was attentive and cordial. The place is owned by the same people who own Grafitti Junction. They envision creating a pathway in the back to "combine" the two restaurants. I describe it as like The Wall Street Cantina and One Eyed Jacks. I see Junkyard reverting to a bar and the barbeque menu filtering to GJ. Let's hope they can avoid being subsumed in the integration. But, entrepreneurs have a habit of exorcising the complexity out of their lives as soon as people start using the "test restaurant" as a scape goat for whatever is going wrong with the "original" spot. In any case, there is now an adequate Carolina Barbeque spot in College Park. The menu is a bit limited, but, it is an experiment or work in progress. Management seemed open to feedback. Which is not always the case if you read the comments on this blog. Plus they have Moonshine infused cherries. Where else are you going to find that? Parking is a problem. *Update - Now part of a Grafitti Junction. 11/18/2013