I've spotted four new places on 436. These are two. I tried them this afternoon. The first is near on the north side of 50. The receipt says Azalea Park. I've never heard that area called that. The second place is at Howell Branch Rd. I'd be surprised if either is with us in a year.
Coffee Burgers Grill - It seemed like it may be a cute chain or something. It was just a boring Puerto Rican café. It opened a week ago. I had the "little" cheeseburger for $2.85 and a chicken philly for $6. The patty on the CB was as thin as a Krystal burger. The odd thing is that the vegetables were the best part. Very fresh. The chicken was the on redeemable part of the philly. The bun was hot dog bad and they used shredded something or other and American cheese. Onions were ok. The chicken was just pounded down, grilled chicken. The place serves all meals. It is oddly brand new yet seemingly dingy. It was empty when I was there. It was a little late for lunch and they are new (1 week), but.... The craziest thing they offer is ribs. Mostly café food. It took longer than it should to come out.
Crab Ocean - It took over the spot that was most recently a Smokey Bones. In a big parking lotted strip mall that has never had anything good in it. It's a by the pound "boil" place. Mostly. I grabbed a fried catfish basket to go from $10. It was better than I expected. I don't usually buy fried seafood, but, I wasn't hauling a pound of boiled shrimp home for dinner. It came with fries. They battered them. But, they were at least fresh and plentiful. They also added some ketchup, cole slaw (tiny tin), and tartar sauce. And a bib, two forks, two sets of plastic gloves and some napkins. Never received gloves before. The portion was four pieces of densly coated catfish. It was fried nicely. Good crust. The lack of oil actually concerned me. Not freshly fried? Or superbly fired? The coating seemed like ground corn flour. I'm not sure if I'll go back. I don't like buying seafood from places that cater to a mass audience. You can't trust the quality of the seafood or the preparation. Although, everything is flash frozen nowadays, so who knows. They sell blue crab, shrimp, crawfish, snow crab, clams, green or black mussels, king crab, dungeness crab and lobster tail (probably Caribbean or Australian). They range from $13 to $34 a pound. They also let you mix and/or choose a "boil" (corn, potato. egg, etc mixed in). I don't like boiled seafood/ I like steamed seafood. Another reason I may not be back. They also have fried shrimp, swai, oystrer, calamari and chicken baskets. All $10. Raw or steamed oysters on the half shell. The place is huge. I would guess the "log" interior is left over from Smokey Bones. They threw up some kayaks and lighthouses to make it "nautical". There is a full service bar in the center rear. A square floor plan. The name is poorly chosen. As is the signage. There was a fancier seafood place down the road that just closed (and the building demolished) and one on Alamo that did too. I'm not sure if they are aware of that. This is a big space and if the lease isn't favorable, I don't see them drawing enough people to make it work.
*I was bemoaning the lack of artistry a few posts back. I'm reading a book now that has it. It's called Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace. It's not new or unknown. Marshall from How I Met Your Mother did a movie about him. All kinds of devotees love this thing. I've almost picked it up several times in my life and got distracted. I'm glad I finally started it. It's impressive. It interweaves multiple stories in a semi-fictional future. Odd settings (and characters) like a competitive tennis academy, AA hallway house, a government agent stake out, etc. It's too bizarre to try and describe. It was written in the mid-ninties and presages phenomena like Net Flix and Celebrity Presidents. I like books like Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and Utopia and Gulliver's Travels that lampoon society. This is in that vein. It's a dense and difficult read at first. You don't understand certain things (like why the dates are "sponsored" by products) and his vocabulary and breadth of knowledge of complicated subject matter is impressive. He writes like Kerouac on a speed high. Few paragraphs. Endless description (but so singular). He wrote his own key word addendum to explain things. It's hundreds of pages on its own. I bought it in an airport for around $20 last April. It was mass marketed for an anniversary. So, it's around. My version is just under one thousand pages (without the addendum). It reminds me of Salinger, Burroughs, Kerouac, Proust, Woolf, HS Thompson and maybe a little Bret Easton Ellis. I dare you to.
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